What can't I just find a normal guy?

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-23-2006
What can't I just find a normal guy?
15
Mon, 01-23-2006 - 8:33am

I don’t understand…

I am almost 34 years old. I am a medical professional. I would describe myself as a lanky, attractive redhead with a Bohemian flair. I am honest. I am witty. I am artistic. I am elegant and smart. I have been divorced for 5 years and just recently started “dating” again.

Problem: Where are all the normal guys???

I am not asking for Mr. Perfect or even Mr. Prefect’s second cousin once removed. I just seems like the guys that I meet say that they are looking to find that “one special girl”, but then we go out a few times and I think that everything is going along great….good compatibility….good conversation….good chemistry…. And then they stop calling, or don’t call as much, or say that they have only one night free this week and they are going out with “a friend”…

I am not suffocating, I am not clingy, and I am honest to a fault.

What do men really want???? I must be doing something wrong. I am supportive, I have a very busy career, and I do not have any disgusting personal habits that I am aware of. What gives???

P.S. I live in the Chicago suburbs, so if anyone has any grand ideas of where all the good men are, please advise.

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iVillage Member
Registered: 12-23-2003
Thu, 01-26-2006 - 6:13pm

Cheryl,


In your first post, the "honest to a fault" line jumped out at me, too.

 Start

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Thu, 01-26-2006 - 7:18pm

It's got nothing to do with you. Men will only get involved if they want to settle down and have a family. If they are foot loose and fancy free, and there are a lot of women around for them to flavor, they will have a little fun with them.

Evidently you have shown that you are ready to settle down. You have met men, that for some reason or another haven't found that they want to stick around. Until you do meet someone who is ready for committment and also fancies you, you can enjoy a full life without a man. Keep trying, otherwise you will never meet 'Mr. Right. good luck

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-27-2004
Thu, 01-26-2006 - 7:20pm

Tee hee, New York Guy, that line is all yours!

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-18-2005
Fri, 01-27-2006 - 12:15pm
Basically you're saying that if I guy doesn't fall head over heels in love with you, that he must be abnormal or have something wrong with him. Instead of putting the blame on the guys (which most women do because they can't stand the thought of any man not wanting them), maybe accept the possibility that there may be something about you that is turning these guys away. I would ask one of these guys if there was any particular reason why they lost interest. That is the only way you can work to correct this unsettling dating pattern. Good luck...
iVillage Member
Registered: 01-23-2006
Fri, 01-27-2006 - 4:45pm
Just to make things a little more clear, I never said that if the guy didn’t fall head over heels in love with me, that he must be suffering from some sort affliction. My whole point was that MEN… If you say you are going to call, then call. If you don’t want to call the girl back, then say “Hey, it was nice but…” and don’t try and kill the waitress if you ordered German Chocolate Cake, and that is exactly what she brings you! Seriously, I have moved on…..

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