What to do?

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-23-2006
What to do?
1
Mon, 01-23-2006 - 5:00pm

Here is my scenario. i was cheated on by a gf a few years back and ever since then it's been hard for me to trust girls to the point of that ending a couple relationships. My current gf said she feels like i dont fully trust her b/c i always ask who she is talking to or texting and she went to a club one night with her best friend (female) and she said she got hit on by like 4 guys but she said she had a bf so they all left but that still wierded me out. Last night she said "The only one you hurt when you dont trust is yourself." I think that should make me happy that guys think my gal is hot and i have her and they dont...shouldnt it? She is the sweetest girl i have ever met and i really cant see her doing anything that would hurt me.

guys: have u been in this situation and how do u handle it?

girls: what are your thoughts?

iVillage Member
Registered: 08-10-2003
In reply to: lostinluv007
Mon, 01-23-2006 - 5:41pm
IMHO, you're the one making yourself miserable with these thoughts of "my gf is cheating on me" or "I can't trust her". Because of your past experience you're condemning "all women you date". Asking her who is she talking to or texting must be exhausting for you. All day your mind is busy with these thoughts, negative thoughts. You know, She was honest in telling you that 4 guys hit on her that night, BUT that she said "I HAVE A BF and they left. You want honesty, right? You got it, but you don't like it. What do you want then? Jealousy can KILL a relationship. Women and men who date people like you get tired and sooner or later they leave; who wants to date/marry a person who is constantly acusing the other of cheating or not trusting them? You will be alone if you don't change your behavior. It's not "her" problem it's YOURS.