What do you don when?

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-21-2004
What do you don when?
8
Thu, 12-01-2005 - 12:59am
What do you tell him when your guy promises to take you out for dinner and then convenently forgets to bring his money and asks you to pay?
Please let the animals live!!
iVillage Member
Registered: 12-06-2004
Thu, 12-01-2005 - 1:26am

I pay and tell him not to worry about it; he can get the check next time. Unless he has a habit of frequently forgeting his wallet, I wouldn't bo bothered at all -- it's likely just an innocent mistake.

What happened?

iVillage Member
Registered: 04-14-2003
Thu, 12-01-2005 - 8:33am

You graciously pull out your credit card and pay for the meal. You smile pleasantly and have him drive you home. You do not invite him inside for cuddling on the sofa.

Once you are safely inside your home you run to the phone and give him a call on his landline before he gets home. You leave a message on the voicemail and say that the chemistry just isn't there for you.

Sounds like he is beyond cheap.

iVillage Member
Registered: 10-21-2004
Thu, 12-01-2005 - 1:32pm
Why do you say "conveniently forgets"? Unless it's a pattern or a habit of forgetting, is he not allowed to make a mistake?
iVillage Member
Registered: 04-14-2003
Thu, 12-01-2005 - 1:54pm

I have never walked into a restaurant without some way to pay the bill. If I forget my credit cards I usually have the cash and vice versa. Most people check for the wallets before they start ordering off the menu, and definitely check if they are on a date.

People that nonchalantly tell their dining partner that they have "forgotten their wallet" are avoiding payment.

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-24-2004
Thu, 12-01-2005 - 2:02pm

If he announces he's forgotten his wallet while you're at the table at the restaurant, say "Sorry. I forgot mine too." Leave and let him wash dishes!

I have a funny story for you. I worked with a girl once. She and I commuted to work on the train. She started dating a guy (another commuter). They had 4 or 5 dates and twice he said he'd forgotten his wallet. The third time he tried to pull this act, she said to him, "wow! You must be starving then!"
He was dumb and said something like "no more hungry than usual at this time".
So she said, "oh! So you DID eat lunch!" He was dumbfounded and said someone paid for his lunch.
Then she asked him how he managed to get to work with no money. He said he borrowed money from someone on the train! He was totally unprepared for these questions. Then she asked him if he knew the person who loaned him the money. He said no, some nice guy gave him the money. By now he was all red in the face. My friend finally called him on his lie and told him she doesn't want to date a lying cheapskate.

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iVillage Member
Registered: 04-15-2003
Thu, 12-01-2005 - 3:20pm
Remind him of it sweetly but he does owe you money. He promised to take you out to dinner
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iVillage Member
Registered: 12-06-2004
Thu, 12-01-2005 - 3:48pm
If we're talking about a long-term boyfriend, I can't imagine getting upset about him forgetting his wallet one time. I know I've forgotten my wallet, car keys, house keys, etc. at one time or another, as have most people I know. I don't think a person should assume the worse of another like that, unless it's a pattern.
iVillage Member
Registered: 10-21-2004
Thu, 12-01-2005 - 6:00pm

<< I have never walked into a restaurant without some way to pay the bill. >>

I have, and I'm a pretty darn responsible person. We're all human. I recall when I left my wallet at home, it was a result of changing my purse and I left my wallet on my bed. That also meant I'd left my driver's license and all.

Guys, obviously, don't have purses. And, it's pretty darn common to take a wallet out of your pocket and put it on a countertop or whatever. IMO, a lot more likely for a guy to leave a wallet than a girl, who most of the time carries it in her purse and doesn't have to take it out unless she needs it or changes purses. Guys are changing their pants everyday (ha!), and therefore, taking their wallet in and out and putting it somewhere else a lot more than we are. That is, unless you change your purse everyday. ;-)

To OP -- If it hasn't happened before, I'd cut the guy a break. And, of course, make sure he picks up the next one! But, if you believe it was intentional, then ... you've already got him judged and pegged as "cheap" ... so, you might as well break it off.