what to expect??

iVillage Member
Registered: 09-21-2004
what to expect??
3
Thu, 09-30-2004 - 9:14am
I recently starting dating a guy, long distance, about a month ago. We IM and talk on the phone every other day, and met up one weekend so far. The weekend was absolutely wonderful, we spent 2 days together, but no sex. Which I think was good because it was our 1st date. And it was good to know that's not all he was looking for. But we are meeting up again next weekend, so I guess I'm wondering what to expect on a 2nd "date". Especially when we are staying with eachother again. I guess what would you expect the 2nd time around, and what does it mean if he does or doesn't initiate anything??

thanks!

-Mel
iVillage Member
Registered: 09-30-2004
Thu, 09-30-2004 - 12:51pm
even though you guys have been talking for a month or so, it is only your second "date" and i wouldnt rush into anything too intimate yet. make him work for it, especially until you can at least honestly KNOW his real intentions. if he doesnt initiate anything, that does NOT mean he's not attracted or interested in you. it just means he doesnt want to screw anything up by you thinking he's disrespectful. if he does try something, go with your feeling at the time. but don't feel pressured to do anything you don't want to do....
Avatar for macgyver17
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Thu, 09-30-2004 - 2:28pm
I agree a 2nd date does not necessarily mean sex. In fact I think it is great that you two are taking it slow. Too many people sleep with each other from the get go and then the relationship goes sour and the other person is left wondering why?

On the 2nd date a kiss might be nice, but even that is not necessarily a given. Slow down and let things happen naturally.

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Thu, 09-30-2004 - 11:27pm
It's sexist, but you set the tone. You have to walk into the date knowing whether or not you want to have sex and go from there. Let him know your own expectations. Don't have sex with him and then wonder why he didn't call, if he thinks he's your boyfriend now, if it means that you're exclusive, etc. Be clear about what you want.