What happened?
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What happened?
| Fri, 04-09-2004 - 8:36pm |
I met a man from church and he pursued me. I went to his house for a party and we ended up sleeping together. We slept together for three months. We never discussed a relationship. Recently he stopped seeing me because he said he felt I had feelings for him and he didn't want a relationship, he only wanted to be friends. I never asked for a relationship, I liked what we were doing, now I am sad because he does not call me anymore and barely speaks to me at church. Things changed when he realized that he had been sleeping with me for three months and really didn't know me. Can anyone tell me what happened? He changed toward me like from day to night. Do you think he is the one with the feelings or was he using me?
Signatures On
| Sun, 04-11-2004 - 1:37am |
He's done. The three month period is a common time for people to assess what's going on and to either keep at it or move on. I dont' think that he's got 'feelings' for you...his feelings may be ones of anxiety...he doesn't want to have to talk to you and have you make demands on him. I don't think he used you at all. You participated willingly without having clarified what you wanted out of the experience.
| Sun, 04-11-2004 - 9:42pm |
It's really hard to have a sexual relationship and not develop feelings for the other person. You say you liked how things were going, but he obviously only wanted a short-term thing. He got what he wanted and is now ready to move on. You can't benefit from analyzing what he might think or feel. Just decide for yourself if you are comfortable with a sex-only, short-term relationship and if not, don't do it again. If you are interested in someone, you should expect them to take you out on dates and get to know you as a person. You may still come to a three-month point where they decide they don't want to take it future and get serious, but at least you won't be feeling like you gave a part of yourself away for nothing.

