what should i do? Please help!

iVillage Member
Registered: 08-23-2004
what should i do? Please help!
3
Mon, 08-23-2004 - 2:23pm
when we first started dating he was very sweet and good to me, he still is. I thought he would take things slow with me and i didn't realize how expericed he was until now. we have been dating a little more than a month. I really like him but he keeps touching me in sexual ways and i like it. I don't know why, But i am scared he is going to dump me. He is much more experienced than i am. That scares me too, because that means he did this stuff with his other girlfriends he has had in the past. Im not sure if i should tell him to slow things down or just let him do what he wants. I want this relationship to last what would be the best thing to do?
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Mon, 08-23-2004 - 2:54pm
blue1718...

Speaking on behalf of the males who might be reading your post, Pianoguy knows that nearly every man will try to get as far as he possibly can with any desirable woman (like yourself)! BUT...if our touching, fondling, over-aggressive behavior bothers you...the words you say are: STOP IT...OR I'M GOING HOME!

If you are worried that you're giving your b/f 'too much too soon'---then "DON'T GIVE INTO HIM" (This was a Gary Puckett/Union Gap tune that got limited radio airplay back in the 70s).

The man you're seeing might have a lot of experience...

But if he has NO "R-E-S-P-E-C-T" for you...and your limits...you'll probably end up hurt by him...and ANGRY at the rest of the men on this planet! So if you don't want this type of 'forced attention'---tell your b/f to COOL IT!

Pianoguy

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Mon, 08-23-2004 - 4:56pm
Becoming sexually involved primarily out of FEAR of losing a guy, won't help you keep a relationship going that's for sure. You should never do anything sexual with a guy that you are not ready to do, or when you are unsure of his intentions towards you, or when you fear he will leave if you don't, or when it would be "letting him do what he wants" - even if it feels good. All of these conditions apply in your situation. One month of dating is not enough time to determine what kind of guy he really is, and it's clear that you have your doubts. You sound very young and inexperienced, and you would be making a huge mistake if you don't slow him down. If he really cares for you, he will respect the fact that you are not ready to become sexually involved. If he pushes you anyway or leaves you, you'll know that his intentions are not good, and you will have spared yourself a lot of heartache.
iVillage Member
Registered: 08-04-2004
Mon, 08-23-2004 - 4:56pm
If you are not comfortable with the touching your boyfriend is trying, have him stop. Tell him you are not ready and you will let him know when that time comes, and please don't let things happen just because you are afraid he will break up with you. If the only thing he is after is your body then you shouldn't be with him anyway. Respect yourself and people will respect you.