What should I think

iVillage Member
Registered: 12-01-2005
What should I think
3
Fri, 12-23-2005 - 1:43pm

My boyfriend and I have been together for 2 years. We talk about getting married. Well I was thinking that maybe I would get a ring for christmas. He keeps telling me that he cant afford to buy me one right now, but it will happen. So then I went home on lunch today and he says "Honey, I just want you to know that if I get my money for plowing you will be getting a ring". So I say "Dont tell me that, you dont know if you are going to get paid for it anytime soon and I dont want to get my hopes up". SO right before I go back to work his boss calls and tells him that he isnt getting paid for plowing this week. So of coarse I was upset and said "See thats why you shouldnt tell me stuff like that because I got my hopes up and 10 minutes later my feelings are hurt"

So I guess I really dont have a question, I just needed to vent because I am just plain Sad now! Do you think I am overreacting and I should just stop being sad?

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-05-2003
Sat, 12-24-2005 - 12:37am

Honey,

I can totally understand why you're upset- I wouldn't want to know that either.

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iVillage Member
Registered: 09-16-2003
Sun, 12-25-2005 - 6:29pm
Well, if he cannot afford it, he cannot afford it and there is no need to get upset or sad about it. Maybe I am just different but you know he wants to marry you, what is a ring on your finger going to change? I think it is kind of childish for you to tell him that he shouldn't be telling you about it because if he doesn't get the money, you will have your feelings hurt. How do you think that makes him feel when he WANTS to give you something but physically CANNOT? At least he is showing you that he is making an effort to buy you the ring!!! IMHO I kind of feel like you are like a little child who doesn't get the toy she wants, so she throws a temper tandrum...I see why you get disappointed but at least he let's you know he wants to buy you the ring... =)
iVillage Member
Registered: 04-15-2003
Mon, 12-26-2005 - 10:59pm

It's very understandable you're upset, given you got your hopes up. Is money so tight that getting married and living comfortably would be a problem or is it just the cost of the ring? Financial considerations are important. Or if it is the ring issue, knowing how much you want it, is there something he can do to make sure he can get you one by

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