What's Love Got to do With It?

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-31-2003
What's Love Got to do With It?
5
Sat, 10-23-2004 - 11:12am
Hi,

Classic story: young, broken-hearted, never had a love to call my own, thought that the story would end there, until... a guy from high school (3 years ago graduated) that used to tease me now thinks I'm beauty-cutie, and wants to ask me out, but is scared to, b/c I'm a little salty in my personality, and oh yeah, I'm getting closer to success each day. With only two years left of college, I feel like I should just stay single since I no longer feel like I need to be part of a couple (my emotions just aren't there anymore) and just go for my own goals, even if it means that spend the rest my life single, which is something that I feel like I can totally handle, and even like, a lot.

What do you think, should I sacrifice career sucess for a potential love of a lifetime? I don't think so, but I took the "Waiting to Be Rescued Quiz" and part of the results warned not become so comfy w/ single life that Mr. Right could slip by.

Thanks.

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Sat, 10-23-2004 - 12:04pm
citygurl104...

Pianoguy is answering your post because of your music quote from the GREAT TINA TURNER! That lady is an excellent performer and STILL LOOKS HOT!

Let's be realistic here...college and career ARE your priorities right now. And considering 'your salty personality'...I doubt you'd be very happy in a sedate, permanent relationship? Besides, you indicated in your post that "your emotions aren't there right now!"

If the man who thinks you're a 'beauty-cutie' understands that you're NOT ready to settle down yet...he might be content to just date you? . But if your b/f demands ALL OR NOTHING...accept the loss...move on with your life...and expect another 4 dozen or more men to start drooling the moment they meet you!!!

After all...you ARE a "beauty-cutie", right?

Pianoguy

iVillage Member
Registered: 07-22-2004
Sat, 10-23-2004 - 9:45pm
If you sacrifice your life's goals for a guy you will find that you end up with neither a life or the guy. A man who is so selfish as to demand you give up what is best for you to suit his needs will never stop catering to himself. You will have a life of sheer and utter misery with him. Stay on track and off this guy's one way train to nowhere. Remember, by expanding your mind and options through college and career your stock is rising. You're out of this guy's league now. With a good education, career, and life you'll be in another sport. He wants to take your independance. Give him the finger instead.
iVillage Member
Registered: 05-31-2003
Sun, 10-24-2004 - 2:56pm
When I think of the times he used to tease me back in school, I'd like to give him the finger, and maybe a nice good curse word or two, but I have come to a point where I have forgiven him inside, even if he doesn't know it. I guess that's another thing that's making the whole situation confusing: could I ever really love this guy knowing the awful things he used to say about my body (he used to tease me about being fat). How could I ever feel sexy/beautiful/loved w/ him no matter how much he tells me he likes me? I'm secure about myself, but whenever I see him around campus, I think about the old days, not about a happy future.

:S

iVillage Member
Registered: 07-22-2004
Sun, 10-24-2004 - 6:15pm
Sounds like you already know where this is all headed. I wouldn't worry so much about the paat teasing itslef, but about what it says about him. And you can't help but worry that down the road if illness or pregnancy put a few pounds back on you will he go back to his cruel and insensitive past? Your worries and misgivings are well founded. Men are like buses honey. If you stand still long enough another one will go by. Next!

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-31-2003
Tue, 10-26-2004 - 10:19pm
It's funny, because I few days ago, I said the same thing to myself. Well, I'm done. ;)

Can't wait til this semester is over, I'm so tired, but it's okay.

Thanks!