When is it considered overreacting???

iVillage Member
Registered: 06-14-2003
When is it considered overreacting???
3
Mon, 03-01-2004 - 10:50pm
I am in relationship in which we've been together for 5 months now. I care very deeply for him like I haven't felt in a really long time, he treats me like I've wanted to be treated and makes me very happy. We've already said "I love you" to one another and we definitely show it. I don't know if it's me but I overreact on everything that happens, but I even question my over reacting and say am I or aren't I? He is a couple of years younger than me, and as well all know some time or another age doesn't really matter but in some cases it comes in between. I have been having these feelings maybe twice a month, to where I just get sick of him and the way he acts and what to break up with him. When I realize what I am saying to myself I get pretty emotional because I don't understand why I am feeling like this. Let me just say that I am a very positive person when it comes to life in general and I always believe in everything bad their is always good, but when it comes to my boyfriend he needs much more convincing than that, I would definitely consider him a moderate pessimist, he blows things out of proportion and overreacts himself. It drives me crazy and that's when I think to myself, oh my gosh he is driving me crazy. I don't know what to do, is this normal, is this rational????? I need some major advice. Thanks.
iVillage Member
Registered: 10-12-2003
Tue, 03-02-2004 - 7:12am
Are there any specific things that you feel you're overreacting on? What sort of situations does it seem to happen with?

And how is he blowing things out of proportion too? A specific example might help us answer it better...

 

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Tue, 03-02-2004 - 7:24am
My best advice - read your post for all the inconsistencies and contradictions - sounds like you are elevating that loving feeling over whether you truly are compatible. I can totally relate to moderate pessimists and often those who strive to find the good in everything annoy me when it seems insincere - for example, 9/11 changed some people for the better as far as being able to make choices - does that mean there was some good in 9/11?? I beg to differ. I see the good in your bf's moderate pessimism - it means that when he is optimistic it is definitely sincere. I don't think his age has anything to do with it, either. I think you need to stop trying to convince your bf to see things your way and respect his perspective on life - if I were your bf I would start to feel controlled by you and would be reluctant to express my position on an issue for fear of your trying to "convince" me to see it another way.
iVillage Member
Registered: 07-28-2003
Tue, 03-02-2004 - 7:35pm
I read your posting and two things occur to me:

1. sounds like you two are spending a little too much time together. when the little things he does start to really irritate you, that's usually the case. too much time together.

2. were you hurt in the past that now you are looking at every little thing with much more scrutiny? been there, so I can understand.

take it easy and try not to overanalyze everything. it's still a young relationship