Where am I standing in this relationship
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| Sat, 03-13-2004 - 6:18pm |
First date we went out the weekend before Valentine. Then he sent flowers and heart-shape ballon on Valentine, but he never called me to talk on Valentine Day. I called him to say 'thank you' for the flowers but he returned the call 4 days later. Then 3 weeks later he called me and invited me out for dinner. We went out the second time. We went to have dinner and movies again. He treated me nicely for these dates ( I can say that).
However, he does not call me any days in the week. I think that he intends not seeing me every weekend and even not calling me. It has been the second week since last time I met him (second time last time), but I have never recieved any calls from him. We work at the same building, but never email or see each other after we started dating. We talked like friends before that. But thing has been changed since the day we started dating.
Please advise me why he does not call me and does not see me every weekend. Can I define that a 'boyfriend and girlfriend relationship'? Is he interested in me? Should I continue going on this relationship or just give up? I am really interested in him, but I don't know why he is acting like that. Should I give myself another chances and wait for this relationship is developing? should I discuss this with him? I think that I am not comfortable to discuss with him about our relationship because the relationship has not progressed well enough. I appreciate your advices. Thanks

Hello rabitjoin, welcome to the board!
Where are you standing? Pretty much on the outside looking in and holding a handfull of hope and confusion.
What yo have is a relationship of convenience... He calls you or sees you when it is convenient for him. Is he seeing others? Maybe, maybe not. What you do know is that he is not seeing you except once in a while.
Now, I would think, since you have known him for a year, that you should feel at least comfortable enough to talk to him about these things. Don't take something simple and make it complicated here. Talk to him... ask him...
What you do know is that you do not have a commited exclusive relationship. If that is your desire then you are going to have to talk to him to find out where you stand with him. He is the only one who knows...
tg
I would ask him up front what is going on next time you see him. If he's playing you, better to find out, and then you can dial down the enthusiasm about ten notches unless you're a masochist. If he's got cold feet, you can try to reassure him. Or maybe it's something completely different. Anyhow, you'll feel better to find out.
Seeing others? Seeing other people yourself? Where do people find all those other people to ask them out, or to ask out, or the time?
Thanks a lot for your advices.