why can't anyone tell me

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-21-2004
why can't anyone tell me
4
Sun, 10-29-2006 - 7:39pm

how they met people or got together?

I've only ever dated people from match.com, so intents are clear. But for the past year I haven't gotten any dates online (I've gotten responses, but I don't like any of them). I would thus like to meet someone offline or ask out someone I already know. I have friends who have done this- either in relationships or people they've dated. But howcome no one can tell me how they got these dates or how they got together? someone had to have done *something* to make it happen. I need instructions, but everyone is keeing it from me, like you have to be in the club of special people to know or something!

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Mon, 10-30-2006 - 5:36am

buggie10...

Pianoguy LOVES to cruise through the 'on-line dating' sites from time-to-time. However, PG has never expected any of the women he has corresponded with...particularly the ones who reside overseas...to EVER meet up with him!

If you HONESTLY want to connect with someone, I think you should pursue men who are closer to where you live...or at least in the state where you're from? You do this by getting involved in activities, charity work, church (if you're religious), enrichment classes, etc.

Approach new people AS A FRIEND...without expecting anything further from the friendship! You'd be surprised at how a person's feelings can INCREASE over a certain period of time when there's no pressure (on your part) to become exclusive.

Pianoguy

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-21-2004
Mon, 10-30-2006 - 9:22am
as hard as it is to meet people, I somewhat understand that part. what I want to know is how *specifically* you go from meeting someone to DATING someone. Like what if you think someone you know is cute, how do you go from knowing them to dating them?
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Tue, 10-31-2006 - 12:11pm

buggie10...

Have you tried approaching someone by way of conversation?

Pianoguy does this all the time...and within the first 3 minutes, a lady who isn't wearing a ring on her left finger will bring up a b/f, a husband, or a significant other? And that's my cue to avoid discussing the possibility of dating her!

If you're not shy...what's wrong with getting to know someone better through a casual conversation? A friendly chat doesn't guarantee that you're going to get an offer for a Friday or Saturday night date! But at least you'll be able to figure out if the man you're interested in wants to be...'more than just a friend?'

Pianoguy

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-21-2004
Tue, 10-31-2006 - 4:06pm
um I "talk" to people all the time, but I've never dated anyone I've talked to.