Why can't he say "I love you"

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-24-2004
Why can't he say "I love you"
11
Mon, 05-24-2004 - 8:30pm
Hello all,

I really don't know where to find answers anymore, I have been dating this wonderful guy, smart as they come, generous, fun, etc. We spend a lot of time together and get along very well, he has introduced to his family and friends and has done several nice things for me. We've done everything you think a perfect couple can do, however it's been a year and half since we started dating, a year that became exclusive and he has not tell me he loves me yet. Actually he did say it once last november after two weeks of being apart, but when I asked what he say, just to hear it again, he would not say it again, he muttered something else, but believe me I know what I heard.

Anyway sometime after that incident I told him I loved him, expecting a "I love you" in return (what an idiot, what was I thinking!! I know), but got a hugh in return, what does that mean?? Any guys out there?? After that I said it 2 or 3 more times, what did I hear back? the firt time: "I like spending time with you". (Are you laughing at me yet?) and the last time was about 3 weeks ago we had been working very hard in a project, and were stressed and fustrated, I just hughed him and said I love you, and well yeah, he said I love you too, but I just stood there and said nothing, what was wrong there? I guess I did not consider that statement valid under those circumstances.

Anyway a few days ago I asked him what did he feel for me, he said he obviously had feelings for me, and that he had showed me how much he cared by spending so much time with me, introducing me to his family and friends, helping me on that big project, taking me to trips, etc. He also said that he knew he wasn't good at expressing his feelings verbally but that I should be able to make assumptions based on these actions. Can you please share some thoughts

Thanks


Edited 5/24/2004 8:42 pm ET ET by andean_angel

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iVillage Member
Registered: 05-24-2004
Fri, 07-16-2004 - 2:28pm
It's funny how things work, after a long 4th of July weenkend together, my b/f went on a business trip I was supposed to go to as well, in the end I had to stay behind completing a different project. I wasn't too available during his time away (about a week) and at his return I didn't accept to see him as soon as his flight arrived, (too early in the morning) but I said I would go to his place in the afternoon. When I finally arrived to his place he hugged me and the first thing he said was "I love you" I must have been shocked because I just stood there silent, after a few seconds I said I love you too. I'm still very busy at work and have not been able to spend as much time with him as before, two days ago he left a message on my voicemail, just to say "I love you".

I guess absence makes the heart grow fonder, really...

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