Why can't I break up with him?

iVillage Member
Registered: 07-24-2004
Why can't I break up with him?
3
Sat, 07-24-2004 - 12:05pm
This guy that I am dating is a complete a**!! He has drinking problem, he is verbally abusive and I see in the very near future him becoming physically abusive. I know I need to and I want to end it, but everytime I go to do it, I can't. What is wrong with me?
iVillage Member
Registered: 08-10-2003
Sat, 07-24-2004 - 1:45pm
Are you scared of his reaction? You should get over this fear if you have it OR get over what makes you NOT to end it. You're seeing the red flags so do something about it. If something is to happen the one to blame will be only you for not getting out now. This man can hurt you if you take more time in ending it.
iVillage Member
Registered: 06-05-2004
Sat, 07-24-2004 - 7:01pm
Hi,

I would ask the same question that ccruise asked you... Are you scared of what he will do when you dump him? If you are that scared, tell him over the phone or if even that is too scary, wait until you know he is not home and leave him a 'see ya' message on his answering machine. I know most people would say breaking up should be done in person but if he has violent tendencies, don't do it in person. However you do it, I wouldn't hesitate to do it soon... you don't want to wait until after he starts becoming abusive.

iVillage Member
Registered: 06-13-2004
Sat, 07-24-2004 - 7:44pm
If you are scared of his reaction--do it over the phone or in a public place. If you are scared of him now--think how scared you will be of him if this continues any farther. Get out of this relationship as soon as possible, and after you do-maybe keep company with people at ALL times for awhile until he calms down. Good luck!