Why compete with ex gf?!

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-09-2003
Why compete with ex gf?!
1
Tue, 07-27-2004 - 5:36pm
Hi, I posted here before, about my free relationship of 4 months with this guy i really like.

Well, we get along great, have fun dates, he says he likes me and stuff, but I guess we are both pretty insecure about each other feelings because we kind of play some games, on my side as a way of not getting hurt on his side I dont know why... He said a couple of times that i treat him bad, and that he once open up for someone but after getting hurt, he only does this if he is really sure the other person cares.

Well, what bothers me now is my crazy head and all her wild and stupid thoughts!!

He and I got out of long rs almost 8 months ago, my ex (who broke up with me)is keeping in touch with me (he doesn t like that, the new guy i mean), but he and his ex dont, but they dated for so long, and he had sooo many things before breaking up with her (he did the break up) that im often scare that deep down he misses her and wants to get back together! He never told me so, i even ask and he said that no, he dont want his ex. But when he talks about his winter and summer vacation (with her), or his previous job (with her) I get the chills!!! Also, he knows plenty of women clothing and stuff because of her... I know i cant compete with his first serious gf in teh long run, but i cant stop thinking about how great, beautifull, perfect, well dress little woman he is missing out or he is used to.

Its too stupid this?

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-05-2003
Tue, 07-27-2004 - 5:47pm
What you're focusing on is that he's talking about HER. What you're not understanding is maybe he's talking about the memory of the vacation, and she just happened to have been the person he was there with. You cannot erase the moments you spent with someone just cause you're not together anymore. You say he was with this woman for a long time, well wouldn't it make sense that he did a lot of things with her? So he's sharing things about his life, and guess what? They involved someone else. That's HISTORY.

What you need to focus on is making new memories and a new history with him.

Photobucket