Why did he blow me off after this?

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-04-2004
Why did he blow me off after this?
12
Sun, 02-12-2006 - 4:16pm
I met this guy on Superbowl Sunday & we were immediatly attracted to one another & ended up having a great conversation so good that he & his friends came up to another place my friends & I went to. We talked for the rest of the night. He called Monday & Tuesday & we had more great conversations. I went out Thursday with my friends and I called him to invite him to where I was going but he had his plans with his friends. Friday monring he sent me a text asking if I had a good time the night before & he said he would have had a better time if he saw me. Then he asked what I was doing on Friday night. I told him I was going to a popular place for happy hour with my girlfriends & he said he was too. Well, he shows up by himself & waits in a 30 minute line to see me. We flirted & talked more and then he had to leave to meet his friends & I left to go somewhere else with mine. At the end of the night my friends & I went to another place & I lost my friends & then ran into him there. At this point I was tipsy but so was he. So we went back to his place & hung out...he showed me all the work he is doing on the house etc. We kissed & ended up in his bed but we didn't have sex. I woke up yesterday with just my underwear on. I was a little mad that it got that far but that's what alcohol does to you. He drives me to his truck, I drive it back to his house, then he drives me to my car & tells me to follow him for breakfast. So I did. He asks me for a kiss goodbye & then says thank you for the wonderful night.
I was feeling weird about the make out session the night before with no clothes so I sent him a text & told him I had a good time the night before & I hoped he didn't think anything werid & that I wanted to get to know him better before we jump into bed. I was hoping for a little reassurance. He never answered me!!
He called me at 3am this morning & asked me to take a cab to his house. I asked him if he got my text & he said he did & that he's busy with working on his house & his friends and whatever. I almost felt like he broke up with me & I just met him!! I was really shocked. I told him I wasn't coming over & I'm not into casual sex. Then he tells me the next relationship he gets into will be with the girl he's going to marry. What's going on here? Did he say this b/c I didn't have sex & that's what he's looking for or did he say it b/c I took my clothes off the night before and he looking at that in a negetive way?

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iVillage Member
Registered: 11-28-2005
Mon, 02-13-2006 - 2:22pm

Dissect it logically -and you see what has no connection.

Basically, you weren't all excited about "getting to know him"...youo were all excited about "being you" - in light of his attention. So the ego boost going too far - led you to in underwear and in bed with a virtual stranger. That shows you need to work on your self-estem....so that you're not so excited about the attention of a stranger that you're putting yourself in danger next time around.

And he wasn't intrested in "getting to know you" - if you hadn't been batting adoring eyes, worshipping his every word, "seducing" him - vs. flirting - he'd have thought "no potential on a hook up" - and looked the other way.

He's not "not interested in knowing you now" becuase of what transpired. He never was interested in knowing you - but doing you - and you presented an impression he had that possibility.

Erin
quickblade14@hotmail.com

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-08-2006
Mon, 02-13-2006 - 3:22pm
<<>> I disagree with this...I had sex with someone I didn't know very well and although we used protection, it still made me a little concerned since condoms are NOT 100% effective. Also, I feel that sex isn't just about the regular intercourse, but also other things and I am not comfortable having someone perform oral sex on me or me perform oral sex on them unless I know them (using protection during oral sex just is not the same, at least not for the woman). I just found myself concerned about my health, even when we used protection. Furthermore, I just find it rather disgusting not knowing how many other girls this guy is sleeping with, maybe only a few hours prior...so everything about sex with a complete stranger gives me the chills...just MHO.

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