Why do men do this....The "YoYo Effect"

iVillage Member
Registered: 07-27-2004
Why do men do this....The "YoYo Effect"
3
Sun, 08-22-2004 - 6:24pm
Ok here is a question for both men and women.

Why do men who have reached the age of maturity say 53 who have been married once with adult children still play games? When a man breaks up with a woman and says I need to go in another direction do not call me, come to my house, email me or anything and the woman says ok if you do not love me anymore or want me so be it. Then the woman doesn't call or email or come to house do they keep calling? First they say I was worried about you and talk like nothing has happened for an hour. Then call the next day to say I am sorry for calling the other day and talk for another hour. Then call a third day to again say they are sorry and then make plans to see you.

This guy would promise not to call me each time he would send me away (3 times in all over the last 8 months). He would wait sometimes a few hours or maybe a few days. The longest was 10 days when he was mad with me over what he saw as a betrayal because I was tired of him breaking up with me. Then he would say it is not good for him to see me, but see me anyway. When I don't take the calls he keeps calling until I do. This time I am not and I am changing the number. If he wants me he is going to have to come with a lot more than what he has been doing and I am not so sure I want him back this time. But what is up with that? Is it sex that makes them crazy or something else?

Thanks for thoughts in advance the more the better.

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Sun, 08-22-2004 - 7:10pm
I wouldn't say that this is a common thing for men, in general, to do at any age. It's this particular man who is doing it, and it could be the sex or could be because he likes pulling your strings, or any number of reasons known only to him. But who cares why? He couldn't do if you didn't let him. And honestly, if any man told me to go away and never contact him again it'd be a cold day in hades before I'd take one call from him ever again.
iVillage Member
Registered: 12-23-2003
Mon, 08-23-2004 - 1:09pm

This is not something all men do.

 Start

iVillage Member
Registered: 08-04-2004
Mon, 08-23-2004 - 1:20pm
I agree completely with the previous poster. You need to stop talking to this guy. This is just a control thing for this guy. He wants to see how far he can go. Cut him off immediately! and never go back.