Why the SAME thing happens over & over?
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| Mon, 10-25-2004 - 9:31am |
It's becoming a routine with me. I meet a guy, think nothing of it, he finds a way to contact me, bangs my door down until I agree to meet up with him. I remain reserved and cautious for quite a while and during this time get loads of contact from him. THEN, as soon as I start trusting the relationship he pulls the plug and breaks it off!!
And it's always the same excuse such as either "I don't love you like you love me" or "I can only offer a friendship, how do you feel about this" or "I love you but am not in love with you"
All this is turning me into a cynical old cow!! I am terrified to trust anyone anymore. And it's not like I'm 16 and have many years to change my dating approach. I'm 31 years old and have the most dreadful string of failed relationships behind me, all for the same reasons. Can anyone help me regain my trust in this world????

First...Pianoguy isn't going to call you a "cynical old cow" which you suggested at the end of your post. There's no profile on you...BUT...do you suppose your behavior gives men the impression that you're (in some way) clingy...or desperate?
Nothing scares a man more than being with a woman who could...err...'lose her composure' during a date or a close encounter. Many of us honestly don't know what to say to you! In a lot of situations, it's easier to 'back off and retreat'---and we choose that option instead.
If you have struck out in relationships 4 times...it's obvious that you're "batting skills" need to be readjusted or completely changed. Do you have any close female friends who might know you well enough to offer an improvement suggestion or two?
And if so, do you trust their 'expertise' enough to take them?
Something to think about from...
Pianoguy
A~
My suggestion... don't have sex with a man until you know you can trust him, and keep your emotions in check (easier said than done, I know).