Will bf upset if I wear that ring?

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-01-2006
Will bf upset if I wear that ring?
5
Sat, 09-01-2007 - 12:24pm

I have this nice fashion ring from ex-bf (not an engagement ring), I would like to wear sometimes, not just because I'm still attached to my ex-bf, just because it's very uniquedly designed and pretty ring.

I'm just more concerned about my current bf being upset, since it's a very distinctive ring, usually it gets compliments from other girls and sometimes girls asks me,"hey, such pretty ring, where did you get it from?" I'm not good at lying, so I know if I wear it, my bf will find out that's gift from my ex.

do you think any way I could get around it? or it's better to just give the ring away?

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-30-2006
Sat, 09-01-2007 - 7:19pm

Everyone has jewelry that could have been given to them by an ex. Maybe your BF has jewelry that was given to him by a woman he once dated. I dont see a problem with wearing the ring you like, unless he has expressed feelings that are troubling you.

If someone asks about the ring just say that it is a gift from an old friend and that should squelch any whispers by people at a party - isn't funny how nosy people are...ugh. If your BF asks who specifically gave you the ring you can privately mention it was an ex.

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-01-2006
Sat, 09-01-2007 - 9:27pm

thanks so much for your answer and support.

I actually really don't like the ex who gave the ring, and don't even like my bf to find out that person was my ex. I just like this ring (the style of the ring), nothing to do with the person.

Since it's a ring for dressed up occassion, I might only wear it for parties or special events, and there is a possiblity that my bf and I will meet my ex in such special occassion. Some friends of mine told me that even though my ex has a gf already, but he still tells others that I was actually his "true love" (I don't feel the same way for him at all) so if my ex sees me wearing the ring from him at party, he might elaborate to all my friends and possibly tell my bf that I am still attached to him. that's really my main concern. My ex is good at badmouthing others and distorting facts, that's one of the reasons I broke up with him. I just don't want my bf to misunderstand. I'm just afraid of my ex talks to him that "she's my true love and she loves me too, look there is my ring on her finger still!!!"

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-30-2006
Sun, 09-02-2007 - 1:31am

Since you have elaborated, I'm not quite sure about my previous post now. I didnt realize that your ex would be at the events that you and your BF would attend. If you feel that you and your BF have a strong enough bond, why not talk to him about this ring and the repurcussions of your ex seeing the ring and see what he says? He might say that you shouldn't let this other guy control what you do and dont do. He might have his own way of dealing with your ex too. Maybe he'll put the idiot in his place.

Sorry to hear you got stuck with a guy who distorts the truth and badmouthes others. And it is always those exes who come back to haunt you later on.

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-01-2006
Sun, 09-02-2007 - 9:16pm

I think since it does bother me so much, I probably will just give the ring away for a peace of mind. If my ex glances at my finger and found nothing, less likely he would make any idiotic statement.

My ex is a bit older than my bf and much more experienced in relationship and distoring facts. I don't think my bf has the abililty to put him into place. So I chose not to wear it for a peace of mind. After all, relationship with my ex wasn't sweet memory.

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-30-2006
Mon, 09-03-2007 - 6:45pm
It is a shame that you have to give the ring away, but you know what is best for you. Hope your ex doesn't cause any trouble for you even if you are not wearing the ring.