Women who want this but do the opposite?
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Women who want this but do the opposite?
| Mon, 07-12-2004 - 3:40am |
I see all these women who want this and that in a man. They complain that they run into these abusive men either physically or emotionally or sometimes both.They complain he doesnt have what i want etc........ They want this and that. Looks, money, stability, independence, confidence, respect, trust, exquisite etc................
Then why do these women search in clubs and bars for these dream guys? Weekend after weekend hopefully gonna meet the man they so desire?
The big thing is, when they do run into the man of their dreams, they butt out and get all insecure because they dont know how to handle him. They dont know how to treat this man of their dreams because they never dealt with a man with these traits women desire.
Women say one thing, but do the opposite? WTF

All men and all women will come across, from time to time, someone who they think is compatible - for any number of reasons - but after some contact, for whatever reason, that person turns out to be not for them.
Men search in clubs week after week just like women do, looking for a partner. Are they all seeking long term relationships? Of course not. Does that mean they're all looking for one night stands? Of course not.
People do what they think is best for them at that point in their life. Because a person is not in a position (financially, mentally or whatever) to be in a committed relationship, should not be an indictment on them if they want to have a mutual, consentual short term (ONS or something longer) relationship or relationships until they're in a place to further commit themselves.
Sometimes the man, or woman for that matter, of our dreams simply turns out to be not who we thought they were when we met. For the most part, nobody we meet is exactly who or how we think they are after we've spent some time with them. So perhaps it's not so much that people suddenly 'get all insecure', but rather the relationship simply no longer fits their requirements at that time.
Not all women say one thing and do the opposite, nor do all men do this. SOME of all men and SOME of all women do. That's just people.
You seem to have a really low opinion of women. While you do, you won't meet women of any character - they'll spot you a mile away and not waste their time, because you don't respect women at all - whether they're women of character or not - because you think we're all out to manipulate and treat men badly. And that's just sad.
I hope you meet a nice girl who's patient enough to prove you wrong.
Eve
Its these women that i see and witness at bars/clubs
I would one day want to find a lady, that would tell me NO, when i ask her to come home with me. I would have respect for a women who would tell me NO. This lady i would like to get to know, because by telling me NO, she shows me she has morals and values. But not yet, every single one is like ok,sure,yeah etc...............
I also think you might want to change your way of actually getting to know women. Instead of 'testing' them by asking them to come home with you to see what character they are, maybe if you simply asked if you could take them out for coffee or something some time, you might get a better hit rate with girls better suited to you. That way you're doing two things - a) you're not immediately assuming the woman is going to jump at the chance to go home to sleep with you (and therefore subconsciously reinforcing your somewhat negative view of women) and b) you might find those women who you think are easy, are just following your lead.
Have you considered that, possibly, the women who come home with you might assume it's all you want? Ya know, sometimes, even if someone is looking for a committed relationship, it doesn't/shouldn't stop them having fun along the way.
For example, say I'm a girl out at a club. I'm single, but I'd really like to find a guy to settle down with, but so far nobody's piqued my interest enough. If you came up to me and offered a night of fun with no strings (coz that's what you're suggesting when you ask a woman to come home with you), I might say why not if I was in the mood, but I wouldn't look at you for more commitment than that, because YOU as well, don't appear more interested in something other than a quick bonk. However, if you approached and offered a coffee someplace, sometime, I might be inclined to consider getting to know you better. Ya know? It works both ways.
I'd be going to bookstores, coffee shops and trying other avenues of dating if you're really out to find a decent girl. Seems you're not having much luck in the clubs.
Meanwhile, as a friendly fellow iVillager, how about just toning down the negativity in your posts, coz seriously, you're putting offside a whole lot of people who could give you useful, constructive advice if you'd just come across as more open and accepting of us (women) in general.
Eve :-)
So, choose well how do you treat women, because the way they treat you it's a reaction of how you treat them.
Also, I don't have ONS, but I have a mind sufficiently open to not think women who have it are sluts!! I do have some women friends who do it, I accept them as they are because I like them as a person.
I think you should first heal that anger feelings you have about women that are distorting you view about them before even try to meet and know a woman. No woman should come up with your prejudices and lack of respect.
Learn to have self-esteem and to love you first, I guess you're lacking that.
Sheri
No woman who has self-respect would pick up with this crap. The women who say no would leave and think he's an idiot who just wants sex with them, and the women who spend the night with him, will think the same, but these are just using him.
I think by these post and the other one that there is one thing women who has respond to him have in common, despite their oppinion on ONS (those who just only have sex in a relationship and those who have casual sex): all they think he treats women like s***, and never want to stay in a relationship with a man like this.
So, my suggest for him: just change your way of seeing things, otherwise you'll lost many wonderful women that cross your way and don't even notice!!!
Open your eyes!!!
Edited 7/13/2004 11:09 am ET ET by funniestgirl