Younger Men

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-09-2005
Younger Men
3
Sat, 08-06-2005 - 6:06pm
I just met this great guy, we have a lot in common including what we want in the future. The only thing that may stand in the way is that he is 19 and I am 26. What's too young? Does age really matter? Should I just take it a day at a time and see what happens?
iVillage Member
Registered: 05-05-2003
In reply to: kristyw79
Sun, 08-07-2005 - 12:36am

From my own personal experience, he's too young. I dated a guy who was 19 when I was 24 and even though it seemed that we were on the same page, we weren't. Same was true when I dated a 22 year old when I was 26, different page.

But at the time I just needed to be with someone and having fun, but when I realized that I would want to be settling down at some point, the guys had to go.

Now I'm 28 and I have a 25 year old guy, and that's about perfect :)

But really, you won't know unless you try it out, so go for it and have some fun. Just ensure that you stay open and honest with each over your intentions and what you're looking for. You could become very serious, or you could have a great ride while you're on it.

Alison

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iVillage Member
Registered: 11-24-2004
In reply to: kristyw79
Sun, 08-07-2005 - 12:48am
I find most guys under 30 are not yet into the commitment thing. There is just too many things they want to do before settling down (travelling and stuff like that). If they were too busy with school or too broke to do some of the things they wanted to do when they were younger, they just start doing these things when they finally do get the money and time. And they put off marriage and kids until later.

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iVillage Member
Registered: 10-16-2003
In reply to: kristyw79
Sun, 08-07-2005 - 5:14pm


i didn't have a very good experience with someone who was 5 years younger than me (he was 22 and i was 27). yes, we had a great time together, we made each other laugh, BUT...were we "really" on the same page even though we were attracted to each other and liked each other and got along well? i was looking to "get serious" .. (even though his age was always an issue, but i guess love makes a person optimistic) whereas he had other things in mind like his career (he got his first job when he met me). he couldnt imagine thinking about "marriage" at such a crucial time. well, guess what, when he started feeling that i was getting more serious, he chose to disappear from my life. yup! i realized later that i had made a mistake. was he capable of giving me the support and love that i needed? unfortunately, NO. now i'd be really wary of dating someone that young. yes, sure, there are younger people who are really mature and know what they want. but i do attribute age with a lot of positive things, relationship-wise.

just be careful.
ask yourself if he has the capacity to handle and take care of all that a partnership will bring. can he satisfy your needs for the kind of love and support you need to stay happy. i am not generalizing, but i do feel 19 is very much on the younger side. if u can handle it, be easy on both of you. but if u r looking for something more, it'll be time to move on, i have to say.