age difference?? worries?
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age difference?? worries?
| Fri, 08-22-2008 - 6:52pm |
I'm new to the dating world as my husband left me just over a year ago. We've been married for 15 years. I'm 40 and the last time I went on a date that wasn't HIM was when I was...23.
I'm getting through the divorce process. (ok, we're separated and the long process of divorce is scary and I keep putting it off for a number of FINANCIAL reasons. no emotional reasons, trust me!)
YIKES. Rusty just isn't quite the word, is it?
But this summer I met a really nice guy. His wife left him for her boss 9 months ago. Cute. Funny. Great company. We live far apart. But he wants to meet up for a weekend.
BUT he is only 33. I'm 40. I feel like a vulture. HELP.

Honestly, I'd be less worried about the age difference (IMO, it's not a big deal) than about a, the fact that he's long distance, and b, the fact that his wife left him so recently.
I don't think meeting up for a weekend is a good idea until you know someone really well.
Sheri
agreed and understand.
We were "together" for a week this summer. We met on a work related event and spent 8 days/nights in each others company. Nothing happened physically, but there was an attraction.
The distance between us is a good thing as I'm no ready for a full on day to day relationship (enjoying doing as I please).
The big worry for me is the age difference. I'm the young one of my friends and most of the people I spend time with are older than I am.
To be blunt I feel like I cougar. or thinking that others will think it's a boy toy thing. I'm being totally honest. If the situation were reversed- 40yo man and 33yo woman?????
I've already told him via email that he's too young- he said that when I'm, 100, he'll be 93......
I don't think
I don't see an age difference.
Go for it, my last relationship was with a man that was 44, Im 63, we had absolutely no problems with the age difference in any aspect of the relationship.
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Just do the math. 33 goes into 40 more than 40 goes into 33. As I see it, you're the winner. Neither of you is divorced and this is a good and comfortable way to get back into dating. Have some fun and realize that this is probably just a transition period.
Go for it.
Thanks for the replies. I am looking at this a just having fun. Who knows.
But I wish I didn't have such a hang up about the age difference. But I tend to over think everything and this is supposed to be a bit of fun!
I just figure I'll be up front about everything with him and see what happens.
But then I have to think about whether or not to meet him for the weekend. ANd if I"m spending the weekend at a hotel with him, does that mean sex? And it would be weird to have a "first date" be a few days long!! It's a first date, but we did get to know each other the week we met.....see I'm justifying it already. :)
"ANd if I"m spending the weekend at a hotel with him, does that mean sex? And it would be weird to have a "first date" be a few days long!! "
If this doesn't mean sex, I hope you two can play one hell of a game of Scrabble ;)
I think you'd be better off seeing how it goes spending a night together first. A whole weekend could get to be a little uncomfortable.
The age issue is all in your head. Believe me, no one is going to call you Mrs. Robinson. And if they did, so what? If you two are comfortable having fun together, then go for it. What you've got doesn't come along every day. Don't waste it.
What you've got doesn't come along every day. Don't waste it.
after the year I've had, with my ego taking a beating, that is the first, the last, the everything I need to hear these days................