can you "grow" to romantically love and/or be attracted to someone?

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-01-2011
can you "grow" to romantically love and/or be attracted to someone?
12
Tue, 03-01-2011 - 9:53pm

Pages

iVillage Member
Registered: 09-06-2007
Maybe he's just destined to be in the "really awesome friend" category?

How long have you two been hanging out? Weeks, months?
Avatar for khatru1
iVillage Member
Registered: 06-07-2004

I think it's a bad sign to not be attracted to someone right off the bat. I think a person can grow to love someone they are not attracted to, there is no doubt about that. The problem is that for many people a lack of a physical component makes for an unfullfilling relationship. Forcing yourself to have relations to someone you have no attraction for is no fun.

iVillage Member
Registered: 02-08-2011
Predictions based on having read this board with my morning coffee for a while and having heard my
iVillage Member
Registered: 11-28-1999

I think that when you have an "amazing guy who's fun to be around" that you have "tons of fun" with, you should give him a chance.

iVillage Member
Registered: 02-22-2007

Depends how much you know about each other.

iVillage Member
Registered: 04-21-2008

I just wanted to pop in and welcome you to the board!

Photobucket

iVillage Member
Registered: 04-17-2008

I would add that being with someone you are not passionate about *could* be a recipe for affairs.

iVillage Member
Registered: 04-17-2008

Music, your points are well taken.

iVillage Member
Registered: 12-16-2004

I'm kind of in the same boat and was going to post to this board as well. I met this really great guy a few weeks ago. I've hung out with him a few times as friends, trying to get to know him better. He's a really talented musician and I find that really attracted. We did kiss a couple times. I like most everything about him, just that I'm not so physically attracted to him. I agree, it's not that some girls wouldn't think he's cute, and I do think he's cute for his personality, but I keep telling myself I'm being superficial.

A couple of my friends have asked me what my problem is, becaue they really like him and don't see why I'm being so "shallow". I'm in my late 30's so not like I'm getting any younger! haha

sometimes I think I go for too cute guys then end up getting hurt because they know they're cute, right? I think I'm not going to give up on it and just try to get to know him more as a friend and see what develops...maybe you can try that too? I don't think looks are the most important thing and I do think that you can become attracted to people for different reasons, but I'm not sure when it comes to a serious romantic relationship. You probably want to have that chemistry and attraction....

I don't know! have you thought about this anymore? I need some good advice too :)

Avatar for xxxs
Community Leader
Registered: 01-25-2010

Hi From my experience yes you can BUT not for long.

dragowoman

Pages