I agree, don't give up on OLD. As you said it is your first dating of any real length of time for a long time. Better prospects will come along. It is always possible to meet people anywhere, work or whatever, but OLD offers you the most efficient way to focus in on the women that you stand the best chance of clicking with. You can easily rule out a large percentage of potential partners just by reading their profile and/or looking at their photo. Nowhere else can you sort through those kinds of numbers and at least get down to those potential partners who have a decent chance to have it work out with you.
For what it's worth, I found her comments rude. Maybe it was just bad word choice, I don't know. I know its all water under the bridge now but it sounds like with her spending habits, when she sees a pile of money , all she can think about is how to spend it, whereas you are happy to let it lie and possibly accumulate interest.
Hey if you find out, would you let me know? I am probably older than you (I'm 52), just got div for the 2nd time. I have been living apart from 2nd ex for over a year and haven't had one date. I just don't have the time or energy to do OLD right now. I think over 40 people don't generally hang out in bars and I wouldn't want to anyway. They do have singles dances for people 40+, but I think that's too much of a meat market for me--it's hard to talk if the music is loud and people are just judging on appearances. I have joined some meetup groups and what I have found is that even though the groups are coed (like a dining group I belong to), the vast majority are women, so that might be good for you. It seems like a more natural way to talk to people, there's not that pressure to date and you can just start by getting to know someone.
Don't dis OLD yet. Yes, it can be a pain, yes, you might meet some oddballs, but for us over 40, unless you are really active and social, it's one of the few ways to meet people.
I am currently dating a few people from OLD, one seems to be panning out quite nicely. He told me he would never have met me if it hadn't been for OLD...we don't live in the same town, our kids are different ages, he works in the city, I work in the burbs...you get the picture. Our paths would never have crossed. But he's really nice and funny and we get along well so far.
Oh, and by the way, he DOES have money, doesn't hide it, but doesn't flaunt it. I could care less one way or another because he is so nice to me and that is all I'm interested in.
We were both married to spend-a-holics, so it is such a relief to not even have to throw that log into the fire.
This thread is very interesting and so I'm inserting myself. Nothing controversial to say...just the thought that my condo is my little quiet place to come home to and yes, how it looks and its comfort level and the way the place reflects my taste is important to me. Pride, yeah, that simple.
A few years ago I dated a man who invited me to his home. A 1-bedroom rented apartment in a retirement building. This man spared no expense when taking me out, but his taste and lack of need for a place that was minimally--at least--roomy was a real turn-off.
Or maybe it was the two huge, overweight cats and the chair completly covered in fur.
Hey, I'm not saying you're living like this--just that women do notice every detail, or should I say some of us do.
I've dated long enough to know what's important and a lack of significant debt rates high on my personal scale. Plus knowing that when you criticize how a person lives, man or woman, well, that's really taking them to task for a significant life choice and surely needs to be broached carefully and tactfully.
So I guess you both learned stuff about the other person. Time will tell...ug. Don't give up. You sound like a man with his feet squarely on the right road to both reality and your values are in place. Keep at it.
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I agree, don't give up on OLD. As you said it is your first dating of any real length of time for a long time. Better prospects will come along. It is always possible to meet people anywhere, work or whatever, but OLD offers you the most efficient way to focus in on the women that you stand the best chance of clicking with. You can easily rule out a large percentage of potential partners just by reading their profile and/or looking at their photo. Nowhere else can you sort through those kinds of numbers and at least get down to those potential partners who have a decent chance to have it work out with you.
For what it's worth, I found her comments rude. Maybe it was just bad word choice, I don't know. I know its all water under the bridge now but it sounds like with her spending habits, when she sees a pile of money , all she can think about is how to spend it, whereas you are happy to let it lie and possibly accumulate interest.
Don't dis OLD yet. Yes, it can be a pain, yes, you might meet some oddballs, but for us over 40, unless you are really active and social, it's one of the few ways to meet people.
I am currently dating a few people from OLD, one seems to be panning out quite nicely. He told me he would never have met me if it hadn't been for OLD...we don't live in the same town, our kids are different ages, he works in the city, I work in the burbs...you get the picture. Our paths would never have crossed. But he's really nice and funny and we get along well so far.
Oh, and by the way, he DOES have money, doesn't hide it, but doesn't flaunt it. I could care less one way or another because he is so nice to me and that is all I'm interested in.
We were both married to spend-a-holics, so it is such a relief to not even have to throw that log into the fire.
This thread is very interesting and so I'm inserting myself. Nothing controversial to say...just the thought that my condo is my little quiet place to come home to and yes, how it looks and its comfort level and the way the place reflects my taste is important to me. Pride, yeah, that simple.
A few years ago I dated a man who invited me to his home. A 1-bedroom rented apartment in a retirement building. This man spared no expense when taking me out, but his taste and lack of need for a place that was minimally--at least--roomy was a real turn-off.
Or maybe it was the two huge, overweight cats and the chair completly covered in fur.
Hey, I'm not saying you're living like this--just that women do notice every detail, or should I say some of us do.
I've dated long enough to know what's important and a lack of significant debt rates high on my personal scale. Plus knowing that when you criticize how a person lives, man or woman, well, that's really taking them to task for a significant life choice and surely needs to be broached carefully and tactfully.
So I guess you both learned stuff about the other person. Time will tell...ug. Don't give up. You sound like a man with his feet squarely on the right road to both reality and your values are in place. Keep at it.
Most of all, have fun doing it!
The OLD idea is not something I have tried yet.
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