How do I stop myself from getting attached so easily??

iVillage Member
Registered: 04-30-2009
How do I stop myself from getting attached so easily??
3
Thu, 03-03-2011 - 10:38am

I've read a couple of posts from people that seemingly have the same issue as me which actually makes me feel better, knowing that I'm not alone with this.

iVillage Member
Registered: 04-09-2008

After our second date, he seemed somewhat distant...which I probably should have just ignored, but I asked him if everything was okay...and he was so confused as to why I would ask that.

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-28-1999

I think having these exciting feelings when you first meet someone are very natural--when you meet someone & you like him and he seems to like you, I think everyone does a version of "maybe this is the guy & we'll be together forever."

iVillage Member
Registered: 09-06-2007

Perhaps it comes down to invididual philosphies on how people think relaitonships start and develop.

To me, the case where someone can declare love after 2 dates and be engaged after a few months seems really SCARY and too FAST. Red flag alert. If a person thought this was ideal and their fairytale come true, then I can see how they might be one to develop feelings quicker and faster. Different philosophies. They might fall into the "hopeless romantic" category where things are ruled by feelings and fantasy.

However, you need real time and quality interactions to see if this person is worth it. Feelings are flighty, feelings change, feelings may come and go - but time will tell, and so will good interactions if it indeed is going to amount to something.

Try not to put the cart before the horse. You could be addicted to the euphoric feeling. Just remember that "feeling" cannot sustain any relationship for the long term.