kinda sad, kinda mad
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| Wed, 07-15-2009 - 9:07am |
Had a great first date with a guy on Friday, he touched base Saturday, we spent the day together on Sunday...but at the end he didn't ask me out again. Two e-mails on Monday, telling me what he did with the rest of the day on Sunday, responding to something I said in the other...nothing Tuesday, nothing today.
But he was on Match an hour ago.
So do I think, "He's over me" or do I give him the benefit of the doubt (He's answering mail...)
What makes me mad is that he was very kind, very specific in his stating of what he was looking for, and HE actually kept extending the date on Sunday by suggesting we keep doing things together, whereas I was ready to leave several times (just thinking it was the appropriate thing to do, not because I wasn't into it), and then nothing.
I don't know if I should send him a quick e-mail asking what's up or just leave it be. On the one hand, I HATE game playing, I prefer people just say what is on their minds and move on, but on the other hand, I realize this is all a game.

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I'm not engaging with you for reasons you are well aware of.
I understand your frustration. No matter what you do or not do people will tell you
Haha (((newlyfoundsunshine))), agree absolutely!
xxx and rock on!
Still on the island, so I'm a bit out of it--
"White satin said: No matter what you do or not do people will tell you it's the wrong thing if you don't get a guy. When it comes to finding love, don't underestimate the role of luck."
Well, yeah. The latest thing I read (and reviewed on Amazon, btw) was a book about finding a husband using the same principles you would if you were looking for a pair of shoes. Alas, the shopping metaphor. OK, so maybe I have an illness and need to either look at or purchase every stinkin' dating book that comes cranking down the pike. I'll admit it. But I don't follow every piece of advice I read.
I thought the purpose of this board was so that we could feel free to let it out, and sometimes there's a lot of you-know-what to let out. There are times that this board and also the Internet Dating board have made me feel much, much better simply from feedback I get reassuring me I'm not alone, that everyone else knows from ghosters, blowtorchers, The Unavailables, and more.
So why the mean stuff all of a sudden? I don't get it. Anyone here is free to express an opinion and there are many folks who've posted rather detailed, thoughtful comments, feedback, and examples of experiences.
The joke is on us. I've dated a ton. I've written a novel about a woman's experience Internet dating 100 men in a year. And even though I won't tell you if my character sashays into the sunset with a man on her arm, I CAN tell you that I'm still looking.
So does that disqualify me from opinionating? Am I less valuable on these boards because I'm not in an LTR?
I don't think so.
+1
Yeah, I don't get the mean stuff either. These boards are a great place to come talk, and I don't see why people can't be respectful, ya know? Being able to talk to other women reminds me of a passage from a Doris Lessing book, two women are talking:
"They had been here since lunchtime, and would remain until sunset, talking, talking incessantly, their tongues mercifully let off the leash."
Crikey, I know I need to let my tongue off of its leash rather frequently!!!!
Unfortunately, Ivillage rules prevent me from telling the whole story and I'm not going to risk my membership over those two posters (who claim to be twins....).
Twins, huh? No comment, but thanks for the heads-up.
As far as the "successful" dating definition goes, I'd expand what you're saying to include the idea that if we've got the guts to get out there time and time again, NEVER giving up, well, that's success. "It's a jungle out there," as a friend of mine says often.
This whole process is like finding an agent for your book--rejection is a big big part of the process. By definition. You won't get rejected, though, if you don't try.
Keeping up your spirit is mighty difficult and plays a major part in the success!
I mean it when I say that these boards keep me going at times.
Apology to everyone, from evil twins here lol.
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