More than friendly intentions?

iVillage Member
Registered: 12-23-2007
More than friendly intentions?
4
Tue, 03-31-2009 - 5:46pm
I've been talking to a guy that has been separated from his ex officially for about 5 months now, but they aren't divorced yet, though they do have a 9 month old baby together but it doesn't bother me. She is the one that out of nowhere decided she wasn't happy anymore, after being marrried to him less than a year. He was willing to do whatever he could to fix things and she didn't want to try. A few months later she moved back in with him and left again 2 weeks later. So it's been about 5 months.

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-05-2006
Wed, 04-01-2009 - 8:39am

I just want my question answered. :) Thanks what question?


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iVillage Member
Registered: 12-23-2007
Wed, 04-01-2009 - 4:29pm

Here's what I had posted. I wasn't aware that it didn't show up..



I've been talking to a guy that has been separated from his ex officially for about 5 months now, but they aren't divorced yet, though they do have a 9 month old baby together but it doesn't bother me. She is the one that out of nowhere decided she wasn't happy anymore, after being marrried to him less than a year. He was willing to do whatever he could to fix things and she didn't want to try. A few months later she moved back in with him and left again 2 weeks later. So it's been about 5 months.

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-05-2006
Thu, 04-02-2009 - 8:50am

Your post showed up and I read it all the first time and then I re-read it again just to be sure I did not miss anything.


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iVillage Member
Registered: 11-28-1999
Fri, 04-03-2009 - 10:25am

I also think that he doesn't even know what he wants. He didn't want the separation and he said that if his wife wanted to come back, he would probably let her. So what is he even doing on a dating site? There are some people (men & women, but I have noticed it more w/ men) who just can't stand the thought of being alone. They don't want to delve into why their relationship broke up and what they contributed to it (i.e. why did his wife lose interest in him so soon after they got married? Very rarely is it all 100% one person's fault, but it could be they just got married for the wrong reasons) so they want to be busy in their free time and avoid the pain. So instead of hanging around by himself watching TV and being lonely and thinking about the fact that he's not w/ his wife & baby, he'll spend most of the night talking to you and probably building this fantasy relationship in his mind. The good part is that at least he's not sleeping w/ you yet.

I can't resist giving unsolicited advice--tell him to stay away until after he figure out what he wants to do w/ his life. Or at least don't try to be more than friends. I just think it's going to end badly for you.