Should I?

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-19-2003
Should I?
17
Wed, 08-16-2006 - 6:54pm

OK, I "joined" Match.com, where there's an abundance of guys to look through--I joined because I got a "wink" and an "e mail" and I wanted to see who from.


Karen ~ wildlucky4me ~

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iVillage Member
Registered: 10-13-2005
In reply to: cl_wildlucky4me
Wed, 08-23-2006 - 8:35pm

I was excited because i had a guy email me and say let's get together. then he sent his phone and told me to call him. so i did -- it was a short call. found out he knows people who live in the same "hood" i do . said i will save telling you who it is for "in-person" to make it more mysterious. well since then no word whatsoever. took my home and cell numbers and disappeared. seems it takes him a long time to get back to a message. let him a quick email today -- how ya doing? my curiousity got the best of me -- blah blah blah. no answer.

so go figure. should i give it some more time or just accept i got blown off?????? it's stupid to say things and not follow through. i would rather hear -- don't want to continue this or not gonna work. but nothing --???????

iVillage Member
Registered: 08-11-2006
In reply to: cl_wildlucky4me
Thu, 08-24-2006 - 1:54am
I know. It does drive me crazy when people say one thing but lack the drive to follow through. When someone did that to me, I just chalked it to lack of interest. Maybe that guy found someone else more suitable for him. It did get frustrating at times. But when that person's interest is elsewhere, then I am better off on my own so that there's room for the next guy --- because that next guy could be someone promising :-)
iVillage Member
Registered: 10-13-2005
In reply to: cl_wildlucky4me
Thu, 08-24-2006 - 4:46pm
So I guess the fact that I thought about calling him today is probably not a good idea?? He gave me his number and i thought maybe he lost mine -- he was on his way out with his brother. Would it hurt?? Or just let it go.
iVillage Member
Registered: 08-11-2006
In reply to: cl_wildlucky4me
Thu, 08-24-2006 - 6:19pm
Maybe he did lose your number. But remember, if he really wanted to contact you, he would have done so via e-mail IF he did lose your digits. This is part of what makes meeting people so icky, I know :-( Anyway, do what feels best. Personally, I would just let things be. You already responded and showed interest after your initial contact. If he really wanted to get to know you, he would have made a much better effort already.
Best wishes :-)
iVillage Member
Registered: 10-13-2005
In reply to: cl_wildlucky4me
Thu, 08-24-2006 - 8:41pm
That's kind of what i thought you would say and that's exactly what i am going to do. me personally -- don't say one thing and do another. if i say i want to get together - then i will make plans with you to get together. high schoolers do that -- not adults. i hate games -- hate them hate them hate them. thanks for your input. it's too bad because we had a few laughs when we talked on the phone and a sense of humor is huge to me.
iVillage Member
Registered: 08-11-2006
In reply to: cl_wildlucky4me
Thu, 08-24-2006 - 11:35pm
I was thinking about how it was like when I first started online dating. I really was on my own. I wish someone told me how challenging it was going to be. I wish someone said that there are more men who just want to score than really want to get serious with a good woman. I wish someone told me that if a guy really wanted me, he would have acted on it so that no other guy would get a hold of me. I think men would move heaven and earth to get what they want (for better or for worse). If a man wanted to really be with one good woman, then he would do so, not just say so. Actions must go with their words, and when the two do not mesh --- oh well. I wish someone told me to not get frustrated so quickly because it does take time to find quality people.
I learned a lot from online dating. I have had regrets that make me cringe. I hated having my heart broken by 2 really great players. I sometimes go over my mind why I did certain things. I made bad choices along the way too. I feel terrible about that, but my girlfriend said that to get to the good, one goes through the bad. I guess such experiences really make one appreciate the great catch even more. I just wish I can let go of my dumb mistakes (yes, they were dumb - nothing major at all). Gee, I get hard on myself - ack!
Anyhoo, I am very happy with my newfound companion. We really do mesh very well in many ways and I feel lucky. I am incredibly grateful for such a friendship!
iVillage Member
Registered: 10-13-2005
In reply to: cl_wildlucky4me
Fri, 08-25-2006 - 6:45am

I know exactly how you feel. I just want a friend -- i hate games. Like i said too high school for me. We all make mistakes don't be so hard on yourself. I was talking to my friend, Brenda who moved to florida last year. Up comes this window and this guy starts talking. Looking for someone to talk to and have some fun with. Okaaaaaaayyyyy -- then it comes out he's still married, bored out of his mind. Go away !! I am not going down that road -- i loved the line " as soon as our kids are on their own we are going our separate ways" PLLLLLLLEEEEEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAASSSSSSSSSEEEEEEEEEEEEE

You sound like you went through the frustrating part -- i refuse to go to bars -- not my scene at all and the people are ......... well you know. Dont' beat yourself up -- sounds like you have a nice friend now.

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