Slept with him on the first date...Is it too late?

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-20-2010
Slept with him on the first date...Is it too late?
Mon, 12-13-2010 - 4:55pm

I made the rookie mistake of sleeping with this guy on our first date. Is it too late to earn his respect? I wish I had waited because he seems like a really quality guy with a good life, someone I could see having a long term relationship with. (Not like some of the jobless jerks I've met over the last several months.)

iVillage Member
Registered: 09-25-2010
The first thing that pops into my mind is "fake it till you make it" the second thing you should do is run to the nearest bookstore and buy some books on dating so you can avoid making this mistake again. There a couple of quick reads like "The Rules" and I believe it has a section in it that explains how to turn a situation like this around. And the third thing is keep yourself busy as possible with your life and see if he contacts you again. Then just go on dates that don't put you in this type of a situation again until you feel more comfortable with him.

I definitely recommend reading up on dating. Another good book is "Mars and Venus - The Five Stages of Dating."

Most importantly, don't beat yourself up, you made a mistake that's all. If he continues to contact you then you will have the opportunity to try to turn it around. In the meantime read up and arm yourself with knowledge!

Good luck, I hope it works out for you. :)
iVillage Member
Registered: 11-28-1999

I think the fact that he stayed around most of the day does indicate that he likes you more than just having a one night stand.

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Community Leader
Registered: 01-25-2010

No! Bu twhy the rush?


iVillage Member
Registered: 12-20-2010

It doesn't sound to me as though he is turned off by your sleeping with him on the first date.

iVillage Member
Registered: 08-24-2006
No, it's not too late. Any guy who would respect you less only because you slept with him "too early" was never worth anything to begin with. Only a--holes and hypocrites do that. You don't need someone like that.

If he continues to show interest, and you are still interested, then respond in kind. Personally I don't carry any expectations of a relationship developing after sleeping with someone on the first date, but it has happened more than a few times.