How to Stop Sabotaging
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|Sun, 07-06-2014 - 12:46pm|
...so I've been dating a pretty great guy for the past 6 months. A couple of weeks ago, he even broke out the big "L" word (which is a first -- I'm usually the do-do that spits it out first).
Sure, we have little issues here and there, but nothing we can't work through. The thing is... I can't get past his ex girlfriend.
Quick backstory... I have known him for years. When I met him, he was with the ex and never gave him a second look. Fast forward three years and we ended up hanging out in the same areas with the sam people (he had broken up with her). So he expressed interest in me and after relentless pursual for six months, I finally gave in and agreed to go out with him... It's been a decent six months.
Here's the thing. His ex seems PERFECT. He's a dance instructor... so is she... I have two left feet. She was in amazing physical shape and I have a few dimples here and there. They were like the "super couple" in our circle of friends, and there are TONS of YouTube videos of them dancing together and you can seriously feel the heat radiating off the screen watching them dance.
I've expressed my concerns (actually I melted down after watching one of the many videos of them together) and he has assured me that they are completely over... that yes, they had LOTS of chemistry on the dancefloor but that didn't translate into a relationship.
So why do I keep comparing myself to this woman? I'll NEVER dance like her or look like her, and chances are I won't be as physically fit.. His family LOVED her (and still works with her and sees her almost daily-enough to get updates on OUR relationship status I'm sure), and I find that I'm exhausting myself just trying to prove that I'm better than her. HELP!!!!
Sadly, this shouldn't be an issue for a woman in her mid-30's... but it is