Are we just friends?

iVillage Member
Registered: 12-27-2009
Are we just friends?
Fri, 01-29-2010 - 4:55pm

I have a male friend, we are very very close.Live several hours apart, email at least 10 times a day,talk on the phone at least weekly for many hours.

I realized months ago that I have romatic feelings for him and told him recently.He said he was shocked and does not think of me that way.

He is quite shy and has not had a girlfriend in several years.I think he does have feelings for me he is just painfully lost in that arena.Many reasons I know this,too many to go into here.

I want to be fair and not push him but at the same time he needs to be fair to me.Sometimes he sends me very naughty emails(not of himself) but maybe a few topless women and some erotic literature, that kind of thing.

He does have other women friends but does not interact the same way with them.Would a guy send you naughty pictures that(he says) turn him on if he did not want to maybe turn you on to?

He can also be touchy feely,stroke my hair you know, that type of thing but says he is not attracted to me that way.

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-18-2009
Fri, 01-29-2010 - 5:06pm

It sounds like you want to put together a good argument to convince this guy that he's wrong about how he feels for you.

Do you honestly think that will work? Because I don't. You want him to be "fair" to you but you have to respect his feelings. So, tell him to stop sending you erotic pictures and literature, and respect the fact that he's just not feeling it for you. Sorry.

iVillage Member
Registered: 09-06-2007
Fri, 01-29-2010 - 5:44pm

I think this is an odd relationship. How long have you two been doing this, 10 emails a day, talking for hours a day, receiving erotic photos that turn him on (What do you say in response do those?), touchy feeliness?

I am thinking that you are liking the attention, because honestly he doesn't sound like that great of a catch. Shy, little girlfriend history, sends you naked photos of women. It all says "weird" to me.

iVillage Member
Registered: 12-22-2009
Sun, 01-31-2010 - 6:19pm

Agree with Sienna76.

First of all, I can’t think of anyone I would email with 10x a day and talk to for hours on the phone.

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-25-2010
Wed, 02-03-2010 - 12:12am


xvx Pictures, Images and Photos

iVillage Member
Registered: 09-19-2005
Thu, 02-04-2010 - 11:11pm

LOL I had to laugh when that girl says it says "weird to me".

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-18-2009
Fri, 02-05-2010 - 7:22am
I agree, he is most likely closet gay
iVillage Member
Registered: 06-08-2008
Fri, 02-12-2010 - 2:42pm

he said he's not interested... believe him!