Blow Off?
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| Mon, 03-06-2006 - 12:45am |
So I have been hanging out with this guy on and off for about two months now. It has only been in recent weeks that we have been hanging out on a more frequent basis. He has now invited me over to meet his friends and this weekend invited me to meet one of his best friends who was in town for the weekend. I have been getting mixed signals from him lately. One moment he will act like he likes me and the next (usually in public) he will act as if there is nothing going on between us. When we finally found a moment alone this evening I approached him and told him I felt like I had been getting mixed signals, I wanted nothing more than to just know how I should be treating the situation (friend or more). We originally started out as friends.
His reply to me was this:
"You are a really sweet girl, I would be crazy to not be interested in you, but I am just not sure at this point." (the just not sure I guess means about liking me?) He went on to tell me he has been really busy the past couple of weeks with school and that even his friends mentioned he had seemed detached.
I guess what I am trying to figure out is if I got the blow off or let down nicely. Should I just forget about anything more and write the whole situation off?

I would say this. After 2 months of hanging out together and he still doesn't know, it's time for you to cut your losses and move on. More than likely he's got other issues going on in his life that are a higher priority. Men seem to freak out when they have a lot on their plate. They will attempt to do other things like hanging out with friends, do stuff for themselves, family, and work. If he doesn't like you, or doesn't have his mind made up about you, then he's just not in to you. And sometimes that happens, you hang out with a guy you start to like him, and he still just doesn't know.
My ex and I were together for 3.5 years. And during that time I went through a lot of "finding myself" and getting myself established with my career. We have been broken up for 2 months now, and for him now is the time where he's trying to "find himself" and getting his career established. I do understand what he's going through now, and I have given him the freedom to do just that. With the relationship portion of that, well he wanted to be together but with the "serious" tag put on to it. I told him that the "serious" is what I wanted, and without you being at the level I'm not going to get back together with you. Granted I'm going out on other dates, and so has he. But there's still something there between us. And if it takes a year for him to figure/establish things for himself then that's fine, but by that time I may already be gone. I just don't know about anything else but today.
In a way he's letting you down nicely. Saying that he's got a lot on his plate, so much so that he doesn't know where to put you on it...if at all. Maybe you two need to be friends. But then again sometimes it's hard to revert back to something after you have feelings for someone. To make my point, you don't know what the future may hold. You just need to be positive, and enjoy life, but don't put yourself in a position where you could get your feelings hurt by this guy, and don't dive too far into it.
He isn’t sure which I take it as, your ok to hang with but I don’t see girlfriend material. I am not going to jump out of this and try to make you mine because something better or someone who strikes my fancy will come along and I will go for it but in the mean time I just want to hang with this because she is cool enough. JMHO