Boyfriend Not Talking To Me?

iVillage Member
Registered: 12-21-2007
Boyfriend Not Talking To Me?
Sat, 11-14-2009 - 11:01pm
On Thursday I texted my bf asking him if he wanted to hang out, he said no, he'd rather take the night to himself. I said that's fine and went about my business because he never said anything after that. At midnight he said, so you're just not going to talk to me, whatever. Threw this attitude. In the morning I tried to apologize, he threw more attitude and I asked him if he wanted me to leave he alone, he said that's fine.
It's Saturday now, not a word from him when we talk everyday all day and have been together for four years. This petty immature crap is ridiculous but I'm leaving him alone like he asked. Should I be the bigger person or leave him alone until he gets out of his funk?
And as I stated in my previous question, these petty arguments spring up almost every week, usually we hash it out in a day but it's been four years, I'm 21 and he's 24 and this type of behavior I just don't understand. I don't talk to you for a couple of hours, you don't talk to me for a couple of days? He acts like he's 17 and I don't feel it's working out anymore and we're just sticking together because we're comfortable, but we're not going anywhere but down and down, not forward.

~*The One and Only *Kiya*~

~*The One and Only *Kiya*~


iVillage Member
Registered: 05-18-2009
Sat, 11-14-2009 - 11:26pm
Vanity, I've read a couple of your posts and it becomes more and more obvious that yours is a relationship that's on its way out the door. I think you're both fighting the inevitable here. It doesn't make either of you happy anymore.
iVillage Member
Registered: 01-18-2006
Mon, 11-16-2009 - 8:51am

I don't think you are trying or wanting to see the relationship and where it's going right now. In your previous posts, it seems that you are trying a little too hard, and not seeing the signs from his end.

Try coming at this situation from a different perspective. As much as you seem that you want to hold on to this, YOU are putting way too much energy and effort into something that's clearly NOT working anymore. There are times when relationships run their course, and there's nothing YOU can do about it. You can only put 50% into the RL and if he's not doing his part, then why do you keep trying???

Instead of being the bigger person and leave him alone, instead just end things with him, and be done with the attitude, arguing, and immature BS from him. Remember...stop rationalizing his behavior and accept the situation for what it is and take the higher road and end it.

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-19-2006
Tue, 11-17-2009 - 12:18pm


I have to agree that perhaps your relationship is nearing the end. I think your BF is the type that throws a tantrum and even though he SAYS he wants to be left alone he really wants you clamoring all over him trying to find out what's wrong. Whereas you are giving him the space that he has asked for.

It seems like the arguments and the silent treatment are symptoms of a bigger issue. Maybe you need to take some time out and decide if this is really for you.

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-27-2005
Sun, 12-06-2009 - 2:54pm
hmm.. sounds like he's a bit immature, have you tried talking to him face to face? sometimes that helps, but if he's built a "immature" wall up he's not gonna comply and you might want to end it before you waste any more time. but if you two can work it out than thats great! I hope i've helped some :-)
iVillage Member
Registered: 09-06-2007
Sun, 12-06-2009 - 6:26pm
If he's throwing out attitude like that on a weekly basis, I would no longer have him as my boyfriend. Dump him!
iVillage Member
Registered: 11-12-2009
Mon, 12-07-2009 - 12:37pm

You say you stay together because you’re comfortable.