Confused about signals

iVillage Member
Registered: 04-17-2009
Confused about signals
Fri, 04-17-2009 - 11:08am

Recently I was dating a guy for a month and some drama happened and we broke up in a very odd way where both of us were out of line.A month later I called and apologized to him for my actions... not in hopes to get back with him simply because it was the right thing to do. I had said some things that were very hurtful and it was only right to apologise.
He thanked me for my apology and apologized as well and than asked me to come over and hang out...we both agreed to be friends. When I got over we were goofy and silly like we usually are (we joke around A LOT) well anyway. We were in the kitchen, I making us sandwiches and he making us a side dish and he leaned over to get something out of a drawer next to me...stops.. places his hand on my hip than gives me a super sweet kiss..than leans back and goes "God..I hate you"
meh? what? At the time I just sort of smirked and said "yeah well I hate you too" the time went on every little thing that he 'likes' about me he would always say in a rather weird sweet tone of voice "I hate that" maybe thats flirting and I find it actually kind of cute...
I asked him when we were on the couch with his arms wrapped around me why he hates me and he replied "you scare me"
....what? I scare him? Than why is he holding me and why is he kissing me?
I than asked him "why do I scare you" and he replied "you just do, you scare the crap out of me"

What does that all mean? I am so confused please help..

iVillage Member
Registered: 08-30-2008
Fri, 04-17-2009 - 7:37pm

How nice the two of you were able to make up. Luckily things didnt get too far so that a simple apology from both of you could resolve things. In my case -- a simple apology isnt/wasnt going to cut it.

iVillage Member
Registered: 09-06-2007
Fri, 04-17-2009 - 9:09pm

If I were you, I'd just step away from this guy. You apologized, now just move on. After dating for just one month (back then) and you guys had a blow out shows how unready you two are for anything. New relationships should not be scarred with this type of thing.

Seriously, I married a guy that was a jokster like this. Would flip me the bird when I came home from work and asked him what he wanted for dinner. Say stuff like Sugarbaby said. But to me! All his "funny games" really took a toll on the marriage and I just didn't like him any more.

To me, this is not fun flirting. Maybe I am biased, but I don't find this type of immature dating signals cool at. all. Sounds like he's 15 or something.

Edited 4/21/2009 1:13 pm ET by sienna76
iVillage Member
Registered: 04-07-2009
Sun, 04-19-2009 - 2:10pm

God, your post made me really think....

My ex was exactly like that!