confused and hurt
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| Sat, 02-11-2006 - 5:11am |
My boyfriend and i broke up about 2 months ago and even though nothing has changed he still tells me he can't be with me right now because of the distance..he lives in salt lake city right now for school and i'm in canada, quite the distance, i know.
The problem is this..
When we broke up it was because of the distance, nothing else..we got along great..we spent alot of time together, hours on the phone and on chat..but the distance was just too much to handle for 8 months, now it's 6.
We recently talked, 2 days ago, i had wrote him an email just to clear my thoughts and he never wrote back, i was alittle disappointed but later when we talked he told me he didn't know what to say. He said he had read it 3 times and then he thought about how 'adorable' we used to be and how much he still loves me and wished he lived near me so none of this would be happening. He has a page on myspace, some site..and i went there today just to see whats new and he was flirting with some girl..for some reason i felt so jealous and hurt, mad...disappointed and i was like "what's wrong with me?" I don't understand why he tells me he loves me and wants to be with me and wished he were here more then anything but yet he goes and does god knows what with god knows who. I don't trust him but yet i can't let go because he still gives hope for us after he's done school. I told him to tell me to walk away so i can move on with my life and he said he couldn't do that because he still loves me..i thought "how selfish" he doesn't want me but he doesn't want anyone else to have me?
I wrote him another email yesterday and i told him to write back, just to write from the heart even if he felt like he had nothing to say, he would because he always did. He never wrote back.
So this is the question, the part that confuses me..
Why does he say he loves me and wants to be but yet i'm not a priority anymore, just an option? Why doesn't he talk to me hardly anymore, reassure me, tell me he loves me everyday..Is he he just playing games? or whats the deal with him now?

Here are the clues: "My boyfriend and I broke up" (self explanatory) and "and then he thought about how 'adorable' we used to be" (he's speaking about your relationship in the past tense.)
Hon, when a guy breaks up with you, he's telling you to move on. Because the two of you have broken up, he is free to do whatever with whoever. But you are also free to date others. If he didn't want other people to have you, then he wouldn't have broken up with you.
To be honest, I think that you're reading too much into what he says about love. (Words are cheap.) Look at his actions and move on.
You should try not to contact him anymore, it just seems like he plays games and gives you false hope to hold on to and everytime he does something wrong, your hurt all over again. Its like a never ending roller coaster of ups and downs, your much better off without him, and finding someone else, maybe not even looking for someone else at the moment if your not ready. Go out with a bunch of girlfriends and get your mind off him!