Dating and Relationship Books

iVillage Member
Registered: 10-20-2005
Dating and Relationship Books
19
Thu, 03-09-2006 - 6:51am
Hi!! Anyone out there have any recommendations on good books about Dating, relationships, self help etc.....

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iVillage Member
Registered: 03-07-2004
Thu, 03-09-2006 - 12:53pm

Lol, this won't come as a shock. If you want to see how your childhood has shaped your adulthood and life outlook, if you want to see how women in the home and in society ultamitely hold all the power and can have all they desire if that power is weilded correctly, so long as you want a reality check and not a kiss your bottom nothings-your-fault feel good read I highly recommend:

Bad Childhood, Good Life.
10 Stupid Things Women Do To Mess Up Their Lives.
The Proper Care & Feeding of Husbands.

all by Dr. Laura Schlessinger.

Avatar for northwestwanderer
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Thu, 03-09-2006 - 1:33pm

FG, are you spiritual at all? If so, then my top recommendation is "In the Meantime" by Iyanla Vanzant. It's all about recognizing that you have to "clean your own house" before you can be in a healthy relationship.

Sheri

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-09-2006
Thu, 03-09-2006 - 4:24pm
ITA with the Proper Care and Feeding of Husbands! It saved my marriage and I wish I had been told about it long ago even before I met my husband. At first I was put off by Dr. Laura but I guess I tried it because I wanted to prove that it wouldn't work, but it worked immediately.

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iVillage Member
Registered: 03-16-2006
Thu, 03-16-2006 - 5:06pm

I agree that 10 things a woman do to mess up her life is a great book. I also recommend:

why men love bitches
men are like fish

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-16-2006
Mon, 04-24-2006 - 6:31am

I agree! I read why men love bitches and men are like fish and they are filled with good advice. The first might might sound like it's asking you to play games, but it's really about being independent and staying true to yourself. I read that book when someone broke up with me and it made me feel so empowered and definitely not as desaparate or sad. I am not in a very happy and healthy 1 1/2 year relationship =)

I am definitely thinking about reading the proper care and feeding of husband. We are not going to get married anytime soon, but it doesn't hurt to have knowledge in advance!

iVillage Member
Registered: 10-03-2005
Mon, 04-24-2006 - 8:50am
I am currently reading The Five Languages of Love by Gary Chapman
I'm finding it very helpful
iVillage Member
Registered: 06-20-2005
Fri, 04-28-2006 - 1:54pm
I have found that the best and most realistic book about the beginning of relationships, moving toward commitment (ie--not for once you are deep into the relationship) is What Men Want. Three men wrote it. I have dated a lot and found it to be dead-on accurate, from experience. (Particularly if you are dating professionals in a city!) Best of luck!
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-31-2006
Wed, 05-03-2006 - 3:36pm

Books are great- but why not ask advice of your fellow female? What answer are you looking for. That would help us direct you to a book and maybe give you some insight.

Savannah
www.ontheroadtomrright.com

iVillage Member
Registered: 04-28-2006
Thu, 05-04-2006 - 1:56pm

Dear Savannahariley,

I agree--ask other women!! He**, we've done the field work! Although I'm partial to Mars Venus theories, what I really love are the women out on the mv message boards. We're a high powered bunch all in all. And we've all battled with low self-esteem, being low-hanging fruit, falling for the "bad boy," having our hearts ripped out (more than once for many of us), and are sharing our common wisdom, what we've learned and are learning with each other.

I've been on that site since October, when my last bf pulled away from me--and believe me, it was NOT what I wanted. It's a process healing from a broken heart, rebuilding your self-esteem, accepting your life without a man and being happy in it! And, not allowing yourself to succumb to bitterness, regret, or blame.

I hope you'll join us--I'm sure you've got a ton to contribute! beyondmeasure

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-09-2006
Fri, 05-05-2006 - 5:36am

Thanks! I have actually posted here many times in the past, more than I care to remember! LOL Everyone here is terrific and offers great advice, I was just looking for a book or two to help me with some more anwsers and to help me better understand how to handle my situtation.

Been seeing a guy for almost a year now, and I suppose I should have left along time ago. Ive come to the conclusion hes a committment phobe. Things are constantly on an up and down. Ive reached the point now of where I cant deal with it anymore, yet I cant seem to let go, or at least when I try Im very unsuccessful.

Just this past week he did nothing to acknowledge my bday, and then told me he'd spend saturday or sunday with me, but never called. When I spoke up and told him how I felt a big battle began, and he made me out to be the one that was wrong. We talked it out after we were calmed down and since Monday hes been calling a few times a day, but here it is Friday, we talked about getting together today, he was supposed to let me know last night, and again no call.

It amazes me just how badly one person can treat another and live with themselves. Im 45 years old and have lived my life trying to be good to others and treat people with respect, yet here I sit, allowing someone to treat me so badly.

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