Dating an older man

iVillage Member
Registered: 08-02-2005
Dating an older man
3
Mon, 04-24-2006 - 12:55pm

I'm 24 and I'm dating a 40-year-old man. Who's divorced. And has a 5-year-old named Hanna. We were friends for a couple of months before it became romantic, and we've been dating for about 3 months. We say "I love you" to each other and I just love his family and little kid (who shares my name). I know he's definitely thinking along the lines of marriage, down the road, not right away, but I don't know if I would be up for it. My main concern isn't even his age or kid, but the fact that he has significant debt from his previous marriage that he needs to pay off. Please advise!!! :)

Hanna

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iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Mon, 04-24-2006 - 3:01pm

hanna_banana_pie...

Simple advice from PG:

"If you're not willing to assume the responsibility for his 'past baggage'---DON'T MAKE PLANS TO MARRY THE MAN ANYTIME SOON!"

Whenever there's a red flag BEFORE you say the words: "I DO"---it's unlikely that a woman will be completely comfortable?

A similar problem or situation in your new marriage...could possibly occur again!

Pianoguy

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-09-2006
Mon, 04-24-2006 - 4:19pm
He's got a heck of a lot more than debt from his previous marriage! But, if the only thing that bothers you out of the many that should is his in-the-red financial status, my advice is to talk with him about consulting a financial planner who can help him lower his bills and pay off his debt.

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iVillage Member
Registered: 09-20-2005
Tue, 04-25-2006 - 10:07pm

Hey,

I'm 22 and my man is 39. We've been dating 10 months. We both have significant debt. Debt is a part of life, and most people will have to take out a loan at one point or another (school, car, house,etc). If you have a concern about his debt do bring it up to him.

Visit us on the may/december boards and at
www.mindtheagegap.com
www.agelesslove.com
:)
Mary Ann