Did I make the right decision?

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-15-2004
Did I make the right decision?
4
Wed, 04-20-2011 - 1:24pm

I have been in a relationship with the same guy for close to three years now. We both came out of marriages and both have two children each.

iVillage Member
Registered: 04-09-2008
Wed, 04-20-2011 - 1:54pm

Yes, you made the right decision (in my opinion). A man who cannot rise to the occasion and be there for you for your grandmother's funeral is not a man you should consider marrying. The way it is now is how it will always be. If you don't leave him, that is.

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-18-2009
Thu, 04-21-2011 - 9:22am

I agree that you made the right decision.

If after three years with someone, he is unwilling to integrate you into his family, there is no future you can have together. This must hurt very badly and I'm really sorry... After this long, if you really think he is hung up on his ex, there is probably at least a hint of truth to that. You seem to have a good enough head on your shoulders to be reasonable and logical and give him the benefit of the doubt. It's really sad that he wasn't willing to go the distance for you but you're absolutely right to break it off now rather than continuing as a girlfriend of "convenience" to him.

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-15-2004
Thu, 04-21-2011 - 9:39am
Thank you so very much! It does hurt but I suppose along with most other things it will pass. Reading your reply was almost word for word what I had told him. scary! Great to hear it from someone else.
iVillage Member
Registered: 11-28-1999
Thu, 04-21-2011 - 10:39am

I can see not introducing your kids to everyone you date, but after 3 yrs & discussing marriage, that would seem to me like a pretty serious relationship.