Is he too damaged? And just my friend?
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|Sat, 05-09-2009 - 5:11am|
For two weeks now, I have been hanging out with a wonderful guy who is a few years older than me (he's 30 to my 23). We have been talking every night for hours, and we go out a couple times a week. He buys me dinner, brings me chocolate....but we haven't even kissed.
A little under 2 months ago, he more or less broke with his girlfriend of 10 years (!) for the final time, a process that had apparently been going on for 7 months or so. He's clearly upset, still, and I totally understand. 10 years is a long time.
A few days ago, I brought up that I had feelings for him. I told him I didn't expect anything, and that I really wanted him in my life, but I needed to know if he only intended to be friends with me--I had sensed chemistry but couldn't be sure.
He admitted he was starting to become attracted to me and that his situation was still a little complicated.
I just spent quite a bit of time with him the last couple days. I found out that he was actually in therapy, and that he had told his therapist about me, and that for the first time in a long time, he was starting to feel happy. We were together for almost an entire day of movie going, dinner eating....
The most "action" I got was when I was feeling really miserable about a family situation and was on the verge of tears when he hugged me, rubbed my back, and let me rest in his arms. But I feel like a good friend would have done that too, maybe I'm wrong.
So what gives? He knows that I'm into him, he seemed to be pretty sure he was into me...but he just left with a nice hug but not even a kiss. We've already achieved an insane emotional intimacy in my opinion...but just no physical action.
Is this a sign this guy is too damaged? I really, really, really like him, and would be willing to wait for him, but would like to know if he's actually wanting to move forward. I can't afford to get heartbroken, not to mention I can't waste my time if he is sure he wants to be friends with me.
If anyone has any insight, type away. I'm at a total loss here.