He's asked me to marry him, but...

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-10-2005
He's asked me to marry him, but...
11
Thu, 11-10-2005 - 5:11pm
I haven't gotten a ring. Time and time again he asks me to. He's asked for 2 years now. And it makes me happy. I want too. And I've said I will. But he insists I don't need a ring. He said I dont need an "object" to prove how much he loves me and wants to be with me. I really don't understand why a ring is such a bad thing. Do you think I should just let it go and accept it?

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iVillage Member
Registered: 11-30-2004
Sun, 12-18-2005 - 1:24am

You didn't say if you guys had actually discussed WHEN you wanted to get married. This is a very important question as far as getting a ring goes. If he's not planning on marrying you until after ya'll graduate from college or something, he might not be giving you a ring now b/c 1) you'll be wearing it for years before the wedding , 2)he may want time to get a good job and buy you a really nice ring, or 3)he may be afraid that since the wedding won't be for such a long time, you may change your mind. If he's talking about getting married soon, he may still be holding out for high school graduation and getting a decent job. I don't know; but I wouldn't neccessarily take it as a bad sign. Maybe he thinks you want a really large diamond or something expensive that he can't afford. Let him know that it's not the size of the diamond(s) or the price tag that is important to you; but that you feel like an engagement ring is an important tradition and that you would be proud for everyone to know that your heart belongs to him by wearing his ring. Good Luck!

P.S. Not to be rude, but if it's just getting a diamond that you're interested in - it's not all that great. I've been engaged twice (for the wrong reasons) and while having a big diamond on your finger is nice, if it doesn't represent true love - it means nothing and you are better off buying yourself a nice right-hand ring for Christmas or your birthday.

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