He's not over his ex

iVillage Member
Registered: 09-29-2005
He's not over his ex
6
Thu, 09-29-2005 - 2:07pm
Hi everyone! I'm new here. I have a question. I met a guy thru some friends. We've been flirting alot and I can tell he's interested. He's even playfully smacked my a$$ a couple times. A mutual friend told me that he's attracted to me and that he's not over his ex yet. We all hang out t/g like almost every weekend so I was just going to do what I've been doing (flirting, talking, get to know him...) and not say anything or pressure him. Am I doing the right thing? Any advice?
iVillage Member
Registered: 06-28-2004
Thu, 09-29-2005 - 2:21pm

I would say proceed with caution.

Also depends on the ex--situation (was it marriage or GF and was it a long term thing)?

K

iVillage Member
Registered: 09-29-2005
Thu, 09-29-2005 - 3:47pm
He was dating someone. She kept stringing him along telling him she just wanted to be friends. Then she changed it to friends with benefits. She started dating another guy and she's becoming engaged to him. He told me alot of this himself and still seems pretty broken up about it. I wanna give him time. I'd rather have this than him rush into something with me
iVillage Member
Registered: 09-16-2003
Fri, 09-30-2005 - 10:33am
Well, I would proceed with much caution to be honest. I just broke up with my ex of over a year and I know he is not over me and I am not over him, we are friends now, but talk almost daily to each other, trying to figure things out, but being friends for now. So be careful so that you do not end up getting hurt and also that he does not feel that you are chasing him, that will only push him away. Let me make the moves and then when the time comes, see if you feel that he is ready to be in a relationship. Good luck!
iVillage Member
Registered: 09-19-2005
Fri, 09-30-2005 - 11:10am
The best cure for a broken heart is another person. That's what I think.... make him forget about that EX! Make him be glad she's out of the picture. But of course, it really doesn't matter whether he is over her or not... definitely still date other people. Whether she's in the picture or not doesn't necessarily guarantee he'll like you.
iVillage Member
Registered: 09-29-2005
Fri, 09-30-2005 - 11:19am
Thanks for all the advice guys. My friend that intoduced me to him, wouldn't have if she didn't think he was a good guy.I can tell he's interested in me, my friend just told me to hold off on telling him how I feel cos he's not completely over his ex yet. So I was gonna strut around him in cute little outfits and flirt, like we have been and feel things out so to speak. I'm not in a rush either, I've been screwed over myself. So I'm gonna show him that I'm nothing like his ex and hopefully make him forget her. She must have really done a number on him because he sounded surprised when my friend told him I liked him. I'm gonna give it time. Time heals all wounds or so they say and you're right the best way to get over someone is to meet someone new. (fingers crossed)
iVillage Member
Registered: 09-30-2005
Fri, 09-30-2005 - 11:28pm
anyway, whatever u do. DON'T let ur guards down. like don't be too available, or have sex with him before he even knows what he wants. I say treat him like a friend first, let him deal with his own issue, because in the end he might go back to his ex and leave u hanging. MOST IMPORTANTLY, don't have sex with him cuz you'll just kill the magic.