I need serious advice
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|Fri, 03-05-2010 - 3:33pm|
I feel so lost, and at a dead end. There is always that one girl. I really need advice on this. Please read the whole thing, and if you have a post I will try to help you out in return. Please...
So I met this girl when I was a sophomore (now I'm a junior), I instantly began liking her but thought that I had absolutely no shot. She was I guess what you could call a popular girl and extremely outgoing. Its weird, I wouldn't consider myself shy. I can be extremely outgoing at times but when I'm talking to an attractive girl I begin to become flustered and pretty dull. I can be somewhat of a Michael Cera or Jesse Eisenberg type at times. So as time went on and I would pass her at school she would say hi and give me a casual hug. Then the school year ended and everyone was signing yearbooks. She signed mine and vise versa. I gave her my cell phone number and told her to txt me over the summer, but I never expected that she actually would.
A few weeks went by and she had somewhat slipped out of my mind until I got back from soccer practice one day. I noticed I had missed a txt from her. I txted her back and we began txting each other for about a week. Before this my experience with girls had been pretty non existent to say the least. There had been a few girls here and there but never one like this. Due to my lack of experience I didnt pick up on the signs that she was interested in me. I thought she wanted to just be friends. One day she invited me to the mall, and when I told her I could go she became extremely happy. Still I didnt know why. We spent the day together and she was flirting with me nonstop and I did nothing back.
After that day more time went on and then she invited me to go get lunch with a few friends. The entire day she would ask me questions and finally towards the end of the day she asked me if I liked her. I responded yes and she blushed and said "well I..." then stopped and it got quiet. Then like the moron that I am I changed the subject. For the rest of the evening we all talked about pointless crap when I got a call from my mum telling me to head home. She was disappointed that I had to leave and gave me the biggest hug I honestly ever had and stared into my eyes. I left and couldn't sleep that night with the thought of her in my head.
Unfortunately this is where it all began to get bad. She was going away for the rest of the summer and wouldnt have her cell phone. Then even worse. I had gone over on my cell phone bill pretty bad and my parents refused to pay it claiming that it would teach me a lesson. Weeks went by and I didn't get to talk to her with school approaching fast. Every once in a while when she was by a computer she would be able to respond to my emails but it was nothing much.
She finally came back but I didnt know about it because I didnt have my phone, and she thought I did. She got a new phone and txted me but got no reply. School started again and to my horror I had no classes with her and my day didnt even consist of a glance. Then one day I finally saw her. She gave me a big hug and we exchanged numbers again and began talking. I felt that she probably didnt like me anymore since so much time had passed since we had last hung out.
We began hanging out much more and whenever she was sad or hurt I would be there for her. At times she would occasionally tell me she loved me but I never once asked her on a date. When I finally worked up enough courage she told me that she thought of me as a brother and that she didnt want to lose me. I was devastated but remained her friend thinking that I could win her over. Around Christmas I bought her the most beautiful present. She loved it so much that she began to cry and gave me a huge hug and a kiss on the cheek. But while this was happening another guy started inching his way into the picture.
This guy captured her heart and she is head over heels for the guy. But there is a catch. He is bi. Pretty much borderline gay, wears lip gloss, perfect hair, he even talks like a girl. But he told her that he likes her and she likes him. I find it unbearable to be around her now because he is all she talks about and I normally say something stupid that makes her angry. We argue all the time now and she says that I am jealous. At one point she told me she couldnt be my friend because of it despite all the good times we had. We always make up, but our friendship is becoming strained. The strange thing is she keeps telling me that she thinks of me as more than a friend and that she really likes me. But the things she says about this guy are becoming bullets that pierce my heart.
The sad part is the guy likes her but is into someone else too. He wont date her but she is convinced that he will. She is absolutely in love with the guy and I am out of the picture all together. I really still like her and every time I try to move on I cant. We have all the same things in common and even picked all our classes together for next year. I love this girl and want to be together but I don't know what to do. Is it possible to salvage this and become something more than friends or is it too far gone? I feel horrible.
Thank You for reading