Is it too fast?
Find a Conversation
Is it too fast?
| Sat, 07-16-2005 - 12:23am |
I've recently broke up with my ex-boyfriend (about a week ago). Me and one of my male friends who I have always found attractive have been spending a significant amount of time together lately and last night he told me he is interested in dating me. I am happy about this because he is everything I have wanted in a guy. However it's complicated for a number of reasons; the fact that I'm getting over a break up, and also that he used to like a good friend of mine a few months back. She still thinks he's interested in her but he has recently told me that he rather just be friends with her. I am confused whether this is moving too fast, and maybe it's wrong that he has liked my friends in the past. I'm not sure how to handle it other than taking things slow and eventually seeing where it goes. Please help!

Your approach of "taking it slow" is the best for you at this moment. Getting involved with someone else after a week of breaking up with your ex is in fact too soon. You need time to grieve and get over your ex. The other guy could be a good support for you as a friend, but he needs to understand that you can't give him what he wants right now - a relationship. Perhaps, in a few months you both two can start dating, but you two have to have the talk where this is clarified.
As for you guy friend been interested in one of you female friends in the past, that's perfectly normal. He was free and so was she at the time. However, if he wants to be just friends with her, he should clarify things with her so when you and him begin dating there won't be any misunderstandings or fights between your group of friends.
Good luck and take things at your own pace.