Just waiting and wondering
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Just waiting and wondering
| Wed, 09-07-2005 - 6:59pm |
To make a long story short......
This guy and I had been friends for years. The kind of friends you are completely true and honest with. We evolved into lovers, and then that ended really good. But I haven't seen him for 9 years. I ran into him and bam bam instant chemistry like before. So, now we've been talking, and "stuff". The thing is I dont know how he feels. We didnt give our friendship a chance to reconnect before jumping in the sac. I don't want to pressure him, but I really want to know what he is thinking. It is driving me nuts. Do I put it all out there, or let things play out????? I think I should hold out, and let nature run its course.
So, everyone voice your opinion Please!!!

What do you mean by "stuff"? Do you mean you've been having sex?
If so, then *absolutely* I would discuss what he's thinking with him! I would have done so *prior* to having sex, but there's no time like the present!
Sheri
Absolutely agree. If you know him well enough to be in bed with him, then you know him well enough to ask where this is going.
And don't be afraid of scaring him off. If he scares off that easily, then you know for sure that he wasn't planning on sticking around.
The key to ANY good relationship, whether it's love, friends, parents, etc. is good communictaion. If you can't talk to each other. If you don't feel safe expressing yourself. You need to either work on your self-esteem or the relationship or both. Becasue secure people with good self-esteem aren't afraid to express themsleves to the peole they care for unless the relationship has an established pattern of being an unsafe place for self expression.
In other words the ONLY reason not to talk to him is becasue you're afraid. Which is perfectly normal and natural but if you'd like to build a relationship - friendship or otherwise - with this man you have to work through your fear and get to a point where you DO feel you can express yourself freely.
Which is just my long drawn out way of saying, "Get over yourself, and talk to the guy if you wnat to know what he's thinking." :) Unless of course you are a psychic or have a close personal friend who is because, short of being a mind reader asking him is the only way to find out.
Well, I have kept my mouth shut. I haven't asked nor have I called. He came by today for awhile. Instead of being the nervous nelly like I have been for the past few days, I was normal. I didn't let my doubts show though at all. I was natural, being my true self. We had a really good time just talking and laughing.
I guess it worked, lol! Who ever said you can't mix friends and lovers HAHA. He is coming over tonight. I am not trying to get ahead of myself. I have plans to restrain, and talk. And if it seems right, I will ask him what he is thinking. If I decide not to ask, I know now he is not running away.
I will keep you all posted, I cant keep this inside LOL! Thanks for the advice!!
Shannon