I'm 23 and my husband is 13 years older than me, we've been togetehr for 3 years. I started just staying home taking care of the house, bills and his now 12 years old daughter. She's a great kid. Then I start working a job working 4 days a week and I'm still taking care of everything around the house myself. In order to make my husband happy and have more motivation, I brought him a $18000 motorcycle and hope he'll be happy and have something to be proud of since he brought me a Mercedez Benz and always complain not having anything "fancy" for himself.
Then, I realize if I take care of the payments of our bill like I've been doing, it's gonna be decade of years before we can pay it off and the whole time I need to be working too. But I'm planning on having a baby in 5 years and staying home to raise my baby so I've decided to start a second job for our future. Now I'm lucky if I can get a day off every 10 days and I'm exhausted all the time. I thought me doing this will make my husband to become more productive and ambitious and I talk to him many times about the plan and our future and he agrees.
However,his attitude is still the same and maybe worse. He is a nurse so he has 3 or 4 days off a week. When he's off and I'm at work, he just lay around the house and drink beer. He may help with soemthing and he makes it sound like a big deal since he almost never help around the house. I buy him few beers when he's off but he always turn around and dig out the credit card, check or my hidden cash to buy more beer, when I got home and seeeing him wasted, I'm very angry because I"m working my butt off outside but he's just spending my money to get drunk. Why I said it's my money coz his paychecks all go to bills and the money that I'm making all go for something extra. We ended up fighting all the time.His only defense is I don't appreciate him and I only insult and talk bad about him.
I will give him some chores to help me out like doing the dishes every other day when the daughter does the other half.He always just wait until I go to work and force the daughter to do his part and I found it unfair to the daughter but he doesn't change his way.He said something bad about me in front of the daughter when I was at work and then she brought it up when we had dinner, he threw a big temper and denied it saying she's lying and threw her with empty water bottles. She cried and I knew she was telling the truth but I couldn't stop him from yelling at her.
Please tell me what I should do, he disappointed me so much that I'm disguised by him and I'm very angry with him since all the promises he made were broken and my sacrifices didn't get any reward but bad things. Should I just let it go and not to force him to do anything? Should I not to be mad when he's drunk when I'm at work since he always tell me he's not doing anything wrong,he's just relaxing at home? Or should I stand stronger or should I leave him now?
Please help!!!!!!!