Might be a bit too early

iVillage Member
Registered: 09-15-2005
Might be a bit too early
8
Thu, 12-01-2005 - 12:42pm

I have never posted to this board before and am hoping someone will give me some type of "advice"....I'm pretty sure it might be a bit hard to swallow considering in my mind I know this shouldn't even be happening.

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-19-2003
Thu, 12-01-2005 - 1:04pm

Hi and welcome to the board… Well if it were me I would be out only for friendship and that is it. No dating for at least a year to get myself together and refocus from the break-up. As I said this is what I did. After that my mind was much clearer in the aspect of what I wanted to be sure I was being fed any game. I think for you, it may be good to step back a little because this isn’t good going so fast. I know this is just me but I would be hesitant on a guy being so forward to kiss me so soon after meeting me. Yea, I know you both had some casual talks but the kiss seemed to be a bit much to me.


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iVillage Member
Registered: 01-13-2004
Fri, 12-02-2005 - 5:09pm
Oops... I understand you have feelings but be very careful when dealing with your kids!
I would rather you get a babysitter and meet at the guys place or elsewhere because of the kids! Kids have strong memories and they don't forget! I was raised by Mr. mom from when I was 7. He chose not to remarry but he never exposed me to any girlfriend. This is an extreme because life goes on you have emotions. On the other hand my mother didn't prepare my siblings and I for a boyfriend so when I was about 9 i went to visit my mom and there was a guy. It create a hostile feeling within me. Kids should be prepared for such meetings because it can create resentment. I felt I respected my father more than my mother. Take time to be with your kids and build the relationship with this guy away from your kids. Only introduce them to someone you are serious with...
iVillage Member
Registered: 09-15-2005
Fri, 12-09-2005 - 1:50pm

I truely agree with you on keeping children and guy seperate.

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-19-2003
Fri, 12-09-2005 - 2:00pm
So what are you hoping will come of this? Do you want another relationship or do you want friendship first? I figure what you give out in the beginning is usually what you get. So have you told him what your really looking for, i.e. boyfriend, friendship, friends into a relationship? Or is this just fly by and let him define it?

Marie

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iVillage Member
Registered: 09-15-2005
Thu, 12-15-2005 - 12:46pm

Well to be honest right now I'm not ready for the whole relationship thing, kind of just want to have the friendship with sex involved (too much to ask for??)

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-19-2003
Thu, 12-15-2005 - 12:50pm

You asked if people get hurt doing this, yes they do. So have your feelings in check right now. When you see him out with another woman or can’t make it for the sex one night because he is entertaining someone else don’t worry about it. Just because you both hang out and have a good time and it is like your dating keep in mind you are not and what he does is his thing and you have no say. Do what makes you happy and good luck.

Marie

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iVillage Member
Registered: 09-15-2005
Thu, 12-15-2005 - 1:52pm

As stated before he understands I have other male friends that I am currently talking to, I am not sexually involved with the others only him.

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-19-2003
Thu, 12-15-2005 - 2:27pm
Not cold hearted just a woman enjoying life. I've done it so I am ok with it.

Marie

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