mixed feelings
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| Tue, 03-07-2006 - 1:52am |
Hi,I am new here so I hope this was the right place topost this.
I had a nasty breakup with my boyfriend last month (He dumped me over the phone and wanted back the pearl earrings he gave me for my birthday.) I am still trying to get over this break up and really don't want to get involved with any one new at this point.
So anyway two weeks ago I was at my friends house for a house warming party and I met this guy (will call him R) who is her husbands friend.He is fairly attractive and very easy to talk with. I made it clear that right now and in the immediate future(next few months) I do not want to get romantically involved with any one.
He lives in the U. K so I didn't see any harm in giving him my email and told him to IM me if he sees me online. That I would like to be friends.
So we have talked on line three times now and I think that he really likes me, but there are some things that he says that seem like a bunch of bull s**t. I feel sometimes like he is just using pick up lines on me.
I would like to get your opions on them.
Here are some of the things that he has said to me that strike me as being fake or off.(sorry they are out of context but i didn't want to post the whole long conversation.)
#1"You need some one to hold you and protect you and not let you go."
#2 "ah, only and ocean between us, but the thought is lovely"(when talking about hanging out together.)
#3 "No this is such a lovely start to my day" (after i asked him if he could talk right then.)
#4 "you are a breath of fresh air."
#5 "I could seriously fall for you."
After he said this I freaked out, and said " oh god,please don't say that." (BecauseI am not ready to be involved with some one right now,and the last thing I need is some one toying with my feelings.)
Anyway he apologized( he also emiled me and said he was sorry.)Here is part of his reaction to what I said.
"chatting like this creates a relationship. It's very difficult to define that relationship.".......
....."so, not idle words, but very thoughtless of me knowing your recent experience and for that I apologise"
I find myself really attracted to him.There are just a few things beside what he has said that throw me off about him.
He is 45 years old (which is two years older then my dad) divorced with two grown daughters. The one is two years older then me and the one is exactly my age (22 years old).
Okay,Am i just being paranoid becuase of my recent relationshipsand break up?Or should I run as fast as I can?
Thanks in advance
cat

the-goddess cat...
Because of your recent break-up, Pianoguy thinks you're in a vulnerable spot right now! . But here are his thoughts...which you can accept or reject:
1. You're already bothered by the age difference between the 45-year old and yourself, so that's a RED FLAG to begin with!
2. His phone mannerisms indicate that he may (or may not) be the man you believe him to be? His words have left you with 'more than a few doubts'---right? And face it, it's very flattering for a 40+ gentleman to be communicating with a woman who seems to like him?
3. The overall distance from him (in the UK) to whereever you live makes it highly unlikely that the 2 of you will eventually get together...UNLESS...YOU PLAN TO MOVE TO THE U.K!
I'll stop here and let other ivillagers contribute their 2 cents!
Pianoguy