Pursue this relationship?
Find a Conversation
|Sun, 04-26-2009 - 3:34pm|
This is a bit of an explanation so bear with me.
I've been living in my neighborhood for 25 years. There is a man who lives here who works in a location nearby, a location where I go often, I'll call him Joe. Joe and I have been having some discussions and it is pretty clear to me there is some romantic interest on both our parts, but we haven't gotten to the point yet where one person has asked the other out. Joe's a nice guy but there are a few challenges:
1) First and foremost. 7 years ago I had a challenge with the location where Joe worked. Primarily, it had to do with some decisions Joe made. It's a long story that doesn't need explaining, but at one point I sent an email to his employer regarding my concern. Joe never met me at that time but since he was involved I cc'd him on the email. Joe didn't like my email and sent me a rather strongly worded response that wasn't very kind. I let it go, I figured if I had shown the email to his employer Joe could have lost his job, and I didn't want that to happen. Eventually, through working with his employer I actually got my way and the situation was resolved in my favor. Again, Joe never met me during all of this. He hasn't put 2 and 2 together yet, but that will happen if I ever tell him my last name.
2) Joe lives about 3 blocks from me. We all have skeletons in our closet, and I have more than a few in mine. My skeletons from many years ago regarding some former friends and boyfriends from the neighborhood, people who have either died or left a long time ago. These things I would rather let rest and not be drawn up. Joe seems like a smart guy, and I don't want to discuss the past. I'm sure he has a past too, and the less I know about it the better. But our neighborhood, being what it is, Joe having a rather inquisitive mindset, I'm sure he could find out the dirt on me if he tries which he would.
3) Let's get back to Joe's employer. Through an odd twist of fate, 2 years ago I dated a man who has the same job as Joe for a few months. Same job, very similar location, same status, some circumstances, same everything. There are very few of these guys with this specific career, however, the location was 1800 miles away (another long story). The exboyfriend no longer works for this employer and has moved on to greener pastures. I'm not really interested in discussing the details of this with Joe, but I won't have a choice. It's a small world and this will come back to bite me if I don't fess up.
My question to all of you: Is there too much baggage here? I've been going around and around about this for a few days and need an outside opinion. Joe seems like a nice interesting guy who deserves a shot, and he is very sweet to me. We have a lot of similar interests, but I don't need or want drama. What do you think?