Rules or NO RULES?

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-21-2003
Rules or NO RULES?
11
Tue, 05-31-2005 - 8:34pm

Hi... I am 34 and sooooo new to the dating scene. I've been dating recently and none of them sparked my interest until my most recent date... one of the first people I'd actually like to get to know better.... and I feel as if I completely blew it and have written it off.

I understand the basics... the common sense piece... a date is just a date and to live in the moment with no future expectations.

I've read books on dating ( Even dating for dummies), listened to friends in the same boat, and even read many posts and I am confused more than ever!!! I know in the future, I'll meet someone again I am actually smitten about... and I'm afraid with all the confusion I have if there are rules. I function great in the business world... but when it comes to personal relationships... that's another story.

Officially are there any real dating rules to follow? Are people having better luck following "rules" or completely going by how they feel? I was always one for good old fashion roles and proper etiquette. But in today's world... that doesn't seem to work? HELP!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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iVillage Member
Registered: 11-21-2003
Wed, 06-01-2005 - 8:57pm

Hi Starbuck70!! Thanks for taking the time and the useful insight!!! Funny you mention smoothered... that's a big thing for me. I have a busy life and have gotten spoiled enjoying my alone time. In looking at future relationships... I know exactly what I want... a balanced blend of my own life and a life together.

I really meant my nice phone message. I didn't want to leave it open ended. And seeing him out the other night... I was very classy and said hello and smiled. We spoke for a few minutes and he told me how busy he's been blah blah blah and he went off to dance. I ended up talking to his best friend for a little while about life in general and NOT A WORD about his friend that I liked and after that I left:) A gracious exit and I felt good.

I'm absolutely going on with my life. It's taken me a long time to get to this point after getting divorced. I really feel comfortable in my skin!!!

I do want to have a healthy mix of communication... and I think that is built in the beginning. I guess practice will make better and you have to kiss a lot of frogs before finding a prince!! One thing that is hopefully is people seem to be finding princes!!! Lately even examples with my friends... I've seen a lot of FROGS!!!

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