SHOULD I stay OR go ????

iVillage Member
Registered: 12-01-2003
SHOULD I stay OR go ????
1
Mon, 11-07-2005 - 12:15am

ive been with him* for 2 almost 3 years and we just recently broke up because his ways were just too demanding and i couldnt take it anymore. weve been broken up for 6 days now.
i lost my virginty with him about 3 months ago and got pregnant at the same time.,
i got an abortion and after that our relationship has been good, bad good then bad... again. ive been thru so much as you can see and now we keep writing back and forth back and forth on our email account. the stuff he saying is on the account is that he really cares about me and that he thought i was the one and he gave me his mind body and soul but i never showed him that i care..
all that is bull sh** because every second i had when we were together i told him i loved him and he still knows it. lately ive been trying to meet new guy friends and be out because my ex-bf is my first love.. my everything. but i cant stop thinking about him ever since i told him it was over between us. i said it all out of frustration and anger.
so its hard to let go.

what should i do.. stay or go??
i really love him and i know he really loves me but our love is sweetmisery= cant live with him or without him.
its so hard to meet eye to eye with him.. its amazing our love got this far.. (2 1/2 years)

iVillage Member
Registered: 04-17-2003
Mon, 11-07-2005 - 12:33am

Hey, I was in a similar situation to you, with a guy for 3years (we lived together for all that time except 1 month), I loved him but he used me and I was basically his mother. We fought alot and although I did some stupid things too I felt that I had to go as I had been thinking it for about 2yrs. So I left about 3 months ago, but we hadn't even shared a bed for 2 months anyway so I had already grieved the loss of that relationship. Leaving was the final step.

Anyway, one month after leaving him, I started dating this new guy. We really hit it off straight away and I am positive that he wil ask me to marry him very soon. So, you may think that this guy is the only one for you, and it does seem scary to leave someone after all that time, but it can really be very worthwhile to do it. No just because Mr Right may be just around the corner, but you need to figure out who YOU are, and what YOU want as an individual. Never forget what you want in life and you need to be happy with who you are before you can really love someone and let someone love you.

I think you should leave him. It will give you some perspective, time to reflect and move on, and put some fun back into your life.

Good Luck!