What does it mean?

iVillage Member
Registered: 07-13-2003
What does it mean?
6
Wed, 07-28-2010 - 2:09pm

I've been with my boyfriend for a year now, and about

iVillage Member
Registered: 09-18-2009
Wed, 07-28-2010 - 3:37pm

As a man I would say to listen to your boyfriend and let him alone.

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-18-2009
Wed, 07-28-2010 - 5:08pm

I'm sorry but mr-te is right... There is only one way out of this misery for you, and that's by leaving him alone and moving your life forward without him. If you stay around pining for him, contacting him, you will be hurting yourself and driving him further away.

It's very unlikely that you two will end up together, in spite of the intensity of feelings you have for him. That's because he has to return your feelings and desires in order for things to work out between you.

You can only move upward by letting him go.

iVillage Member
Registered: 07-13-2003
Wed, 07-28-2010 - 5:16pm
Thanks for the info.
iVillage Member
Registered: 05-18-2009
Wed, 07-28-2010 - 5:21pm
I wouldn't be picking up the phone. Here's what I'd say:
"Listen, you've put me through a lot, and I can't handle these daily phone calls. If you want to get together and stay together, then tell me so. Otherwise I'm going to stop answering the phone."
iVillage Member
Registered: 07-13-2003
Wed, 07-28-2010 - 5:55pm
wow, unfortunately, I'm not sure I can tell him not to call, I know I should but not sure I can.
iVillage Member
Registered: 09-23-2009
Thu, 07-29-2010 - 9:30am

You are setting your self up for a life of letting a man treat you poorly and accepting this, meanwhile letting him know that he can do that, and you still want him regardless, because you love him.


You have to leave love out of the equation. He doesn't adore you enough to put his all into the relationship. He stays out all night and doesn't tell you his whereabouts. If a man said he wasn't sure he wanted to be with me or not, I would tell him, "Don't let the door hit you on the way out." I would tell him not to e-mail or call me, because I need to move on with my life. You're not getting closure when you're still speaking to him. Do you really want to risk him coming back and then leaving again because of his uncertainty?


Like Kelly Clarkson's song says, "I need a man by my side, not a boy who runs and hides."


Get some self worth here. Find a man who treats you the way that you would treat him. If he doesn't, DO NOT SETTLE. You have a lifetime ahead of you. Spend it with someone who is worthy of you.